A Neurotic's Guide to the World

as random as the stuff I own

2012-01-30T17:32:00.001+11:00

Today I decided to find some Norwegian radio to start theassimilation process. Found a station on iTunes radio. Immediately discoveredone can be tone deaf and still sing on the radio in Norway…good to know (youmight’ve found your market Dad). It got better after that. I think I’mlistening to the accordion at the moment. I hope this is just a folk musicstation…

I have company this week (a Spanish friend who looks at melike I’m science experiment gone wrong) so I thought I’d be good and clean myapartment this weekend. But since I’m about to move across 2 oceans, cleaningturned into an unanticipated scavenger hunt of “where did all this stuff comefrom???”

Strange discoveries:

- I must have 4000 batteries. About 70% are deadbut I never know what to do with them. I learned that you shouldn’t throw themin the trash, but never got to the second part of the lesson that explains whatto do with them. Fortunately someone told me of a place that takes deadbatteries.

- That same place also takes old cell phones. Agood thing because I have two extra. How did I go through 3 phones in as manyyears??

- 6 roles of Scotch tape. This is your fault, Dad.Thankfully the German’s young son significant taping needs.

- Princess crackers: not the kind you eat. TheBritish kind that you pull apart, jump at the noise and then put on a hat whileplaying with the princess stickers inside. I got these for my nieces but didn’ttake them all to the US. For awhile I was putting the stickers on my PhDstudent’s manuscript drafts to soften the blow of criticism but I still havetwo crackers left.

Anyway you get the picture.

At least once a day, I get this overwhelming sense of panicand think “#$&%! I’m moving to a place I’ve never set foot in”. The rest ofthe time I’m torn between being excited to be leaving this place and sad to beleaving my friends.

I, however, will not be sad to leave the spiders…

Thoughts on Norway

2012-01-20T11:36:00.000+11:00

I’m moving to Norway.

Well duh, didn’t I mention that 2 weeks ago? On Facebook? Ifsomeone says something on Facebook, then it has to be true. The details weren’tclear at the time so I just announced it and left it at that.

So here we go: I got a 2.5 yr contract to work at theUniversity of Bergen and several of the associated institutes. I’m heading backto the US in April and then start the new job in May.

I would’ve thought after a year of applications, interviews,rejections, I would’ve been ecstatic, elated or some other emotion startingwith the letter “e”. But I’m not much of anything. After a year of “holy-shit-now-what???”,I think my body is producing its own form of Prozac.

There is a part of me that would rather go back to the US,settle down somewhere (preferably Colorado) and live a monotonous crazy-lady existencefull of cats. But the economy frowns upon my plans … If I can’t go back to theUS then I might as well find another adventure and hell, why not pick the exactopposite of Australia.

So now I’m starting the process of moving to anothercountry… again. When I moved to Australia, I was mostly terrified of moving toa country with the similar language, customs, and … yeah seriously? I don’tknow what I was afraid of, the unknown I guess. Now I’m sort of excited for it.Rather ironic given that I have to learn a new language and a new set ofcustoms. Right now I can recite the days of the week and count to five inNorwegian. I’m going to be popular with the intellectual crowd.

I imagine this blog will become quite amusing as I finishthe last days in Australia and start again in Norway. Most of my actions arenow taken with the move/Norway in mind. For example, I am now working my waythrough every half used bottle of lotion I own. I am not shipping it anywherebut I can’t just throw it away. It’s sad how much crap I’ve accumulated overthe past 3.5 years.

3.5 years??? I was supposed to be here for 2….

convicts, crowns, and cool books

2012-01-18T14:31:00.001+11:00

Sort of sums up my weekend in no particular order.

I went to the dentist on Friday, fearing a root canal andcontemplating a marriage proposal so I could get some of my money back.Fortunately, the root canal was not needed (only a crown) so I opted tocontinue my singleton existence. Besides, he tried to waterboard me with thatlittle water spray-thingy. Pretty sure that’s grounds for divorce.

A butterfly trapped inside the cafe. My friend had to explain I was an obsessive photographer and not casing the joint.

Anyway, after the dentist, I hopped on a train south tovisit my lovely and sole Australian friend. I love love love getting out of thecity. And there is something very citified about taking the train somewhere forthe weekend. I spent two days in the country enjoying the quiet and finallylearning the basics of cricket. We spent one day driving around the countrysideso I could get my fill of natural landscape before spending hours in asecondhand bookstore in the middle of nowhere. Yes, people, this is how I liketo spend my weekends. Much better than slaving over research articles, believeme.

The weather was rubbish so I worked on my b/w photography with this interesting plant.

It was the best bookstore I’ve ever entered. It looked likean old cabin with books lining every shelf from the floor to the rafters, onthe floors and even on the rafters. It smelled faintly of woodsmoke and 30smusic played on the radio. In this bookstore, I found an 80 yr-old book on anAustralian expedition to Antarctica that I couldn’t resist. If I weren’tleaving the country so soon, I’d have left with multiple squeal-inducing piecesof literature.

Anyway, it was quiet and lovely weekend that ended on abizarre note. I had to take the bus back to Sydney as the trains weren’trunning. As we sat waiting to leave, an interesting young man boarded the bussans shoes, shirt or ticket and gave the bus driver some sob story that belongedin the lyrics of a country music song. The driver bought it and the lad movedthe back of the bus in a nervous shuffle. Creepy but there were severalinteresting characters on the bus so I just went about my business of staringmoodily out the window (isn't that what you're supposed to do on long bus trips?).

By the time we reached the connection depot, I was doing a“dance” and practically ran off the bus in the direction of the ladies room,and plowed into several police officers. Turns out our little shirtless buddywas an escaped convict trying to get out of town.

Somewhere in the fields of Goulburn, an escaped convict waits.

My friend had mentioned the jail before and thought wonderedif it was safer to have the jail in town as the escapees would likely want toleave pronto.

I believe her theory was proven correct.

Endorphins, they work

2012-01-12T14:07:00.004+11:00

Ringing in 2012.

Every year, I usually post a year-in-review summary.

So here it is:

2011 sucked, but at least I bought a lot of camera lenses.

Moving on…

This year has started on an ambiguous note. I workedstraight through New Years and haven’t stopped.

Then I went to the dentist and was told I need a crown andpossibly a root canal.

Now this may seem like a downer beginning to the year, butreally my dental issues are nothing new. It’s actually been a while since I’vehad any problems. So maybe this is a positive omen for the year. A sign thatthings are going back to normal.

Or maybe I’m just on crack.

A full moon lighting up the night sky.

Either way, I’m combating my high-stress moments with a doseof snorkeling every evening after work. Not only do I get some nice exercise, Iget to hang out with the fish. It is quite soothing to just float along,watching the fish engage in their everyday aquatic activities. The first nightI went, the water was clear and I saw all sorts of wildlife, including astingray!

The second night was not so successful.

Note to self: don’t go snorkeling in murky water the dayafter you’ve watched Jaws. I lasted 15 minutes before the cold and myimagination drove me out of the water.

Top 10 Photos of 2011

2012-01-01T15:18:00.002+11:00

This has got to be one of the strangest New Year’s I’veexperienced. While we wait for this shittiest of years to make its way out thedoor, I thought I’d do something cheerful and post my top 10 favorite photos ofthe year. Ok so it’s really 11. Choosing these was taking more time than ittook to choose grad school so I’m going to pretend like I can’t count (not surehow much pretending is needed here).

11. The Calm Before the Storm (Lake Te Anau, New Zealand - Feb2011)

Not in a literal sense. But that night (and the trip)epitomizes the best part of 2011. The rest of it…meh.

10. Astro-alignment (Terrigal, NSW - April 2011)

Not the best photo ever but it marks the beginning of the astrophotography obsession. Like manyphoto shots, I stumbled into it by stumbling out of bed early one morning.

9. Lightning Sprites (Indiana - August 2011)

My first lightning photos. My dad and I took an impromptudrive to chase one storm, which did absolutely nothing of interest. Got homeand this pretty little cell had popped up near the house.

8. Disappearing Mountains (Queenstown, New Zealand - Feb2011)

My one other NZ photo that made the list. As much as I lovedthat trip, I now wish my photos were better. And yes, the title of this photois lame.

7. Mountains? (Snowy Mountains, NSW - June 2011)

The Hoosier and I had a rained-out camping weekend but thedrive back through the Snowys made it worthwhile. I took 800 photos in 2 hours.

6. The calm before the mice (Murray-Sunset National Park,Vic - September 2011)

It was the last night of camping of the NSW/Vic road tripand we stumbled into this pretty little park and this pretty little sunset.Then the not-so-pretty little mice stumbled in to our tent.

5. The Girls (August 2011)

I don’t take many people shots but the girls are good andlet me practice on them.

4. Hoosier Autumn (Indiana - October 2011)

Yeah it’s staged but it reminds me of how much I love autumn.

3. Ancient World (Mungo National Park, Middle-of-Nowhere,NSW - September 2011)

We stood in an ancient lakebed and took photos of starsshining with ancient light. It was pretty damn awesome.

2. 2000^th time is the charm (Rocky MountainNational Park, Colorado - October 2011)

In the 7 years I lived in CO, I must’ve taken 100 photos ofthe mountain. I wasn’t even going to take any this time, but I couldn’t resist.And I knew as soon I took that shot that it was one of my best.

1. Lunar Eclipse (Coogee, NSW - June 2011)

You knew this would be #1. See story here.

Randomness from a Workaholic on Christmas

2011-12-26T13:11:00.003+11:00

Christmas lights in Erie. There are no words.

Merry Christmas!! It’s Christmas night, and I am cozied up on the couch,eating Reeses and watching the last run of A Christmas Story* while lookingthrough my loot and doing a bit of work. I realized that I’ve not posted in a few weeks so here’s a bit ofrandomness for you.

It was supposed to be a work-free holiday. But one badmeeting before I left and one frustrating email two days before Christmaschanged that. Work seemed to be calming down for awhile but a “glitch” now hasme working straight to the new year. However, rather than freaking out toomuch, I just bought two camera lenses instead. Retail therapy…it works.

This is all part of the same house.

Even so, I am happy to be in the US for the holidays andtoday was a nice break from work. I shouldn’t complain, but we know I willanyway…it’s what I do. I didn’t do my customary travel blog because a) the tripwas rather uneventful…with the exception of the moronic passenger who thoughtit was a good idea to stand up during take –off (the flight attendant has goodlungs) and b) I was in a pissy mood from work so it would’ve sounded like satanwrote the post.

I get the polar bear and the penguin, but a helicopter??

(Is it weird that I think one of the elves (not Will) from the movie Elf is kind of cute?I swear, I didn’t have anything to drink…oh wait nevermind.)

During a 10-min car ride the other night, my nieces got intoa very heated debate…over the gender of Justin Bieber. No matter how much Marahand I tried to convince her, Natalie (who is 4 y/o) refused to believe that theBiebs was of the male gender. At point she started yelling “ No, Aunt Laura,that boy is a girl!!” You know, I reallycan’t blame her.

*I love A Christmas Story. In a perfect world, I could writelike Jean Shepard (and take photos like Ansel Adams).

Lunar Eclipse Part Deux: Revenge of the Mosquitoes

2011-12-11T12:54:00.001+11:00

Bye bye moon...

I have been most fortunate to witness two lunar eclipsesthis year, particularly since the next one is not until 2014. However, Mother Naturemakes me work for my astro-nerdiness. Last time it was rain …this time it was a plague of insects not seensince Moses’ day.

Like my last experience, the whole day threatened clouds butby evening, hints of a clear sky kept the hope alive. This time, the positionof the eclipse was perfect for viewing from my bedroom window. An excellentprospect since I was not willing to brave the Coogee crazies alone at 1am on aSaturday night. By some miracle, I stayed up until midnight when the moonstarted to disappear, first by the Earth’s shadow and then by the clouds. Aftera spell, I was joined by a fellow astro-nerd (it's always nice to have someone else there to validate your loser/nerd status). We waited “patiently” for theclouds to dissipate (the phrase “bugger off clouds” was uttered 49 times) butwhen they finally acquiesced, the trees insisted on blocking our view.

Finally it was decided the backyard was the best position.In the three years I’ve lived here, I have never gone into my backyard…itrequires a 4 story descent and let’s face it, I’m lazy. Anyway, I have not beenmissing out as we discovered it is a haven for mosquitoes. Two minutes after Igot down there, the Brit complained of itchiness, but I was in myphotography-coma, felt nothing, and assumed it was paranoia, not mosquitoes,attacking him. But then I stopped to let him use my tripod and realized my legswere Thanksgiving Dinner for the little harbingers of West Nile.

We held out for a few more minutes until the thin layer ofapproaching clouds gave us the excuse we needed to ditch the session before webecame the victims of a cheesy horror flick.

Given that it was 2am and I slept horribly the night before,I was expecting to fall blissfully asleep. Instead I spent an hour trying notto think about the bites…and missing Wisconsin.

Sunday Procrastination

2011-12-04T13:41:00.001+11:00

I got this handmade card from Natalie...except there is nothing in it. I feel like there is a subtle message.

I had great plans to spend the morning/early afternoonmimicking David Attenborough, but the weather has put a stop to that. It’sgotten so windy out that I’d be better off mimicking one of the Weather Channelmorons in the middle of a hurricane. Instead I am listening to Christmas musicpunctuated with crashes of thunder. In some ways I like the dreary weather.It’s kind of cold and I can ALMOST pretend its Christmas-y out. Almost enoughto pull out A Christmas Story. I’ve been thinking I should introduce this movieto some non-Americans, but really? Would they get just how great it is? Do youhave to be American?

Marah wrote this for me. She is a much better speller than I, but I don't know why some words are highlighted. I think I am the girl on the left. I must've been having a good hair day for once.

Either way, I'm looking forward to being back in the US in less than two weeks.

In case you haven’t noticed, I actually don’t have anythinginteresting to say…I just can’t motivate myself to work at the moment. I’vebeen working like a mad person the past two weeks and have gotten not one buttwo papers submitted to my boss (ok, one of them isn’t really mine, but Iworked damn hard on it).

I got this from a graduate student. The similarities between it and the ones from my nieces is a bit disturbing.

Yesterday I took the ENTIRE day off. It felt so decadent.Spent most of the day in the city, learning about the fiddle, foreign countriesand doing my best to not think about ENSO, Modoki or sea ice.

Ok I should really go do some work…or take a nap.

Thoughts on Thanksgiving from around the world

2011-11-26T12:16:00.001+11:00

I wrote this earlier but forgot to post it…

It’s Thanksgiving Day in the US and Facebook is a cornucopia(don’t ask how long it took me to spell that bloody word) of posts on gluttonyinvolving turkey and person-to-pie ratios. The closest I came to dessert thismorning was a lengthy conversation on the relative merits Reddi-Whip vs“squirty-cream”. I don’t even know what the latter is, but apparently it existsand it exists in the US.

Facebook is also full of people leaving to for Black Fridayshopping…but it’s only Thursday night? What the…seriously?? Sometimes I am gladI live in a place that realizes shopping at midnight is wrong unless you are oncrack. That being said, I was highly tempted by the camera sales. Damn you, Amazon.

I skyped with my family this morning. They had thatI-just-stuffed-my-face-and-would-rather-be-in-a-coma sort of look. But thatdidn’t stop them from detailing the Great Gravy Disaster of 2011 (not unlikethe Bean Soup Debacle of 199-). It’s weird how minor cooking disasters can makeyou really miss your family.

Thankfully the cement gravy is probably not bio-degradableso I will get to see it in a few weeks when I get home...unless a hazmat team takes it away first.

things to be thankful for.

2011-11-24T13:03:00.001+11:00

I'm grateful for getting to camp in such beautiful places!

It’s Turkey Day and I have yet to convince my boss that Ideserve this day off. So I’m curled up on this dreary rainy day, listening toCharlie Brown’s Christmas (hey, it’s allowed now) and working on TWO researcharticles. I need a creative outlet…well, some of this scientific writing is creativebut in a very unintentional sort of way.

I am thankful…

- For not pissing off that lady who threw her drink onsome man…and his $6000 camera.

- That I had no idea I was an illegal immigrant for aweek until after I was legal again.

- For the lovely memories I have of my grandma who passedaway in May. She taught me how to fish, play poker, and swear in Polish.

- For my oh-so-awesome friends who saw me through one ofthe strangest years I’ve had. And in particular to the German for not having mecommitted.

- For anyone who has made me mashed potatoes.

- For “high-fives” and smiles from the cutest Brazilianever.

- That I didn’t get attacked by those wallabies…or bittenby that snake.

- For all the amazing places I saw this year.

- That I am not at work today because I would likelystrangle someone there.

- For astronomy lessons and photography sessions on atiny lake in New Zealand.

- That my sister and her husband have not gotten divorcedover a game of Settlers.

- For Reese’s Pieces.

- That my parents are my parents … as much as I like mywords, I couldn’t even explain this if I tried.

- For the hot cardiologist at IU North…ok the fact thathe is hot is completely irrelevant. It just had to be said.

- For my wide angle lens… this needs no explanation.

- For having long hair that is keeping my neck warm onthis cold dreary morning.

Ok in all seriousness, I am just thankful for the goodmoments. In a year full of bad moments, it's the good that sees us through.

Oh yeah, these were in no particular order…I do not valueReese’s Pieces over my parents.

why I shoot

2011-11-20T10:32:00.001+11:00

There is a quote from this book on Antarctica that I’mcurrently reading that has stuck with me all week:

“Just look: look with your mind and your soul, and not justthrough your camera’s viewfinder. Memory is worth more than a thousand digitalfiles.”

I have to say, he’s got a point…I just don’t think itnecessarily applies to me.

I think a lot of people, myself included (sometimes), spendso much time trying to capture the moment that we forget to enjoy the moment.But for me, being the photo-obsessed lunatic that I am, taking the photos isthe moment. It’s what I love, getting lost (sometimes literally), forgettingeverything around me except for finding the proper light and background…it’skind of surprising I haven’t walked off a cliff yet.

For example, my recent trip to Colorado/Indiana. I don’tneed any more photos of these places. ButI was just so damn happy to be back in Colorado… and autumn makes me giddy likea school girl.

Long's Peak, Rocky Mountain National Park:

The weekend in between nerd conferences, I got to spend most of the day hiking in RMNP. It was getting late, the light was starting to fade and my travel cohort was looking ready to keel over from the altitude. We hadn't had a great view of the mountain. Then the views presented themselves and kept getting better and better. The poor trees are getting their asses kicked by the pine beetles but it makes for some great shots. And, I have to say, I always love bringing other people here.

Somewhere in Indiana

I was still rather sick and even more tired, but there was a tiny little patch of woods near my parents house that was still in full bloom. How could I resist? I traipsed around the woods, kicked leaves took 150 pictures...and kept 4. Of all the things I miss about the US, autumn is pretty high on the list.

A quick little tribute

2011-11-12T06:47:00.004+11:00

I like the fact that my mom is sort of looking at me like I am crazy. She knows me well.

After a long and crazy week (is there any other kind?), I am getting ready to head off on a weekend adventure, but I first wanted to give a quick little shout out to Veterans Day and in particular my Dad who was, is, and always will be, a Marine.

Anyone who knows me knows that I think my Dad is pretty much the greatest person ever. From him, I inherited my love of photography, astronomy and sarcasm.

More than that, my dad is probably just the nicest person I know (a quality I did not inherit). If you know him, you know what I mean.

However, I'm pretty sure he cheats at Scrabble.

----------------------------------------------------------------
Anyway, I shall end with an amusing little anecdote about one of my other veteran relatives. No one else may get it, but my parents will appreciate it.

Many many moons ago, we were having dinner with my mom's cousin Ken who also served in Vietnam. I don't remember how or why, but the subject of Agent Orange came up (google it). Ken mentioned that he had to go through psychological testing as a result of being exposed to Agent Orange (I would think just going through a war may warrant an evaluation). Anyway, after a long series of tests, the doctor proclaimed him...."almost normal". And that was the end of it. Hmmm...thorough.

I was reminded of this story years later when he seemed perfectly willing to drive off a cliff in the wilds of Italy.

NSW/Vic Road Trip

2011-11-08T21:43:00.005+11:00

It is my 300^th post and I feel like I should post something momentous to mark the occasion.

So I shall tell a tiny tale of a trip to nowhere*.

Once upon a time, a loud-mouth American and a “lanky” Brit drove to the far reaches of NSW. We were in search of nothing other than unique landscapes, breathtaking starscapes and a desperate need to escape. Escape Sydney, escape illness, escape work … just escape.

In a car that should probably only be driven on newly paved highways, we drove on unsealed red roads that went on forever and made me think of Tom Petty's "Into the Great Wide Open". We drove past kangaroos and bunnies and emus. On occasion, we drove into birds and lizards.

We drove 1000 km to visit a national park, only to find the main attraction restricted to tours. The kindness of the guide allowed us to play on rocks and sand dunes of a surreal landscape. It was in that same national park that I stood in the middle of an ancient and desolate lake-bed one night and watched the universe swirl around me.

We drove again into another state and camped by lakes full of algae and salt, eerily pink under a gray and moody sky. It was by this lake that I sat on a picnic bench and watched Venus fade to red and then disappear into the horizon…and felt the first bit of peace that I had in months.

To the Brit’s delight, I threw a watermelon and startled a snake, thus shaving several years off my life.

To my delight, field mice found their way into our disintegrating tent that night and body-slammed the Brit before taking refuge in a package of cookies.

We drove again, and belted out 90s songs as if our lives depended on it. But eventually the escape came to an end as the lights of Sydney came into view, reminding us of our inescapable realities.

In the end, nowhere was a good place to be...and those stars...

* I had originally meant to turn this into a multi-post story but for reasons I don’t have, I’m not going to. Someday I may tell the full story of the snake and field mice. It’s a good one.

domestic travel and the merits of duct-tape

2011-11-07T20:03:00.003+11:00

Did you know that Jordan Catalano is in 30 Seconds To Mars??

This concludes today’s completely random observation.

Anyway, I always post about my trips to the US but never the trip back to Australia, which turned out to be more noteworthy part.

The trip to the US was relatively uneventful but I had the unique experience of traveling with a non-American. Traveling into the US is fairly straightforward. Foreigners seem to have a head’s up on the delights of immigration. But no one tells them that traveling within the US is a different experience that results in fear, confusion, and the urge to elbow punch fellow travelers who cut in security lines with their 42 carry-on items before crowding around the gate with their seating 4 boarding pass. And don’t forget the fact that people getting off the plane move in two speeds: 1) ludicrous speed in which they will decapitate you will their briefcase if you don’t get out of their way or 2) ludicrously slow speed, encompassing the entire jetway and moving at a pace that old men in walkers would scoff at.

On the way back to Sydney, I was on my own, free to make my quirky observations. I must’ve moved up in my superstar flyer status. For all but my first domestic flight, I was one of the first to get upgraded to first class. Usually on these flights, 1st class is predominantly businessmen, full of height, kindles, suits, and carry-on items. And then there is me, lacking height, formal attire, but can sit cross-legged in the seats and happily reading my book on Norse mythology that I discovered in my pile-o-forgotten-junk at my bro’s house. When did I buy this??

On the way to LA, I mostly spaced out, staring at the mountains. I love flying over the Rockies. For the first time in a long time I am home-sick for Colorado and Sydney is the last place I want to be. But for now, I forget my stress, remember to breathe, and enjoy the beauty of the snow-capped mountains passing beneath me.

I took time from my melancholia to notice that the pilot left the cockpit. To ensure his safety, the flight attendants put up a wire fence between the seats and the galley area. It took every last bit of energy to restrain myself from asking if it was electrified. I suspect questions like that would get me into trouble.

Get to LA with more than 5hrs until my flight to Sydney…until I look at the departure screen to find the flight has been delayed by 3hrs … oh no wait, now it’s 4hrs. The reason: aircraft servicing…in my mind this means there’s a guy on the tarmac trying to convince others of the merits of duct-tape “no, Billy, listen, I’m telling you this shit will keep the wing together”.

I spent my 9hrs in the united lounge, writing a research article, stalking my friends and working on job applications. It was a strangely productive evening. I got ambiguous news about one job and a request for an interview for another job. Hell, I may have actually gotten a job and been too tired to notice.

We left at 2:30am. The thought of duct-tape related mechanical failures did not deter me from sleeping 12 of the 14.5hrs, occasionally waking to find stuff in my lap: food, immigration card, etc.

So now, whether I want to be or not, I am back in Sydney. The sky seems bluer than I’ve ever seen it and the ocean soothes my frazzled nerves so it’s not the end of the world. AND bananas are finally affordable again.

diary of a snow day

2011-11-04T01:15:00.003+11:00

Maybe not the best day to sit under a tree and read.

Oh yeah, I’m back in Denver by the way. It’s hard to keep up.

6am: Wake up with strange feeling of paralysis in my legs. Realize Stitch is sprawled across them. For something as small as he is, he uses his weight effectively.

7am: Snow thwarted my plans to head north to see my lovely friends. Grrr…rather irritated but I also get to be lazy for the day…

7:30am: Laziness turned into a long list of things to do today. I blame my parents for teaching me to have some sort of work ethic.

8:30: While washing face, Stitch comes into the bathroom starts running around and crying. I suspect Timmy has fallen into a well, but I ignore him (it’s not like he told me where Timmy was). Stitch gives up, licks the floor and walks away.

9am: Out to play in the snow for a bit. Searching for that dare-to-be-great shot. I’m still sick but I could have an axe sticking out of my head and I would forget if I was in search of a good shot. I have to say, I’ve gotten some of my best shots ever on this trip.

Nothing like a good romp in the snow.

1045: I am watching One Tree Hill… I have never watched this show in my life. Now I know why. On the couch is Stitch’s “cone of shame” which is finally off because his paw is finally healed. Stitch jumps on couch and starts licking the cone as if he missed it. And I thought I had twisted relationships…

11:00: Leftover Halloween candy is evil.

11:20: Job applications. I’ve been impressive with my quest for employment. Since being in the US, I’ve completed applications for 4 jobs in 4 countries, one of which is not English-speaking and the only phrase I know sounds suspiciously like “snakes on a plane”.

11:45am: Multi-tasking at its best: I am watching a movie, applying for a job, doing laundry and talking to three people online. Amongst them is the Dirtbag, who gets my evil cynicism better than anyone else and has much photography knowledge.

12:30pm: Eating leftovers from the best Italian dinner I’ve had in ages. The garlic bread alone was enough to make me propose to the owner.

1:20pm: Talking to friend online and…and ditched mid-conversation to take advantage of excellent photo opportunity I saw out the window… I at least explained.

1:45: Hmmm…photo sucked.

2:30: No really, Halloween candy is evil.

3:00: Something was missing, the trip to the US felt incomplete…and then I went to Target. Quality-wise, Target in Australia is similar to Walmart…minus the firearms. But here it is my sanctuary.

4:30: Chased dog around the house. I did not fall but had a little too much fun sliding across the hardwood floors. Sometimes, it’s nice to be 10y/o again.

4:45: Seriously evil.

6pm-8pm: Family home. My brother and I have lengthy conversation over the relative “merits” of the Day After Tomorrow vs the Karate Kid. My sister-in-law quietly beats her head against a wall, probably wondering how she made it longer than Kim Kardashian.

Death By Tea: I think the English would be proud

2011-10-31T23:50:00.004+11:00

Oh how I miss autumn...

A few conversations since being back in Indy:

Me: Oh shut up, Jim Cantore, you’re an idiot.
The Weather Channel still incites my rage.

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Me: I brought apple cider.
Sister: Good, what kind of alcohol can we put in it?

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Ok the following isn’t so much a conversation as an incident in my sister’s household.

During our pumpkin carving party, Marah discovered a spider running around near the hallway. Now this was not the tarantula-like beast that seized my apartment in Sydney, but probably the size of my fingernail. However, its presence paralyzed Marah. Natalie has no such fears, running up to the spider and inquiring: “Spider, are you dead?”

I’m guessing this was a rhetorical question as the spider was doing its best to run far far away. Natalie was not deterred by its attempts to flee.

Natalie: It’s ok, daddy, I’m going to get my bag and kill it.

Into the play area the little exterminator disappeared, with occasional calls emanating from the toy bin “Hold on, I’ll be right there”.

Be afraid, be very afraid.

True to her word, Natalie re-emerged with a bag full of tea party items, prepared to smack the spider out of existence (I always imagined that the English kill spiders with their tea cups as well). However, after a few over the head whacks at the spider, the only thing she hurt was herself when the bag hit her in the head. Extermination was put on hold while tears were comforted.

The little monsters.

Meanwhile, Marah was still very aware of the spider’s continued existence and not terribly enthused at the idea of entering the hallway, its last known location. Natalie, sensing her sister’s distress, got down to business, picked up the bag o’ weapons, found the spider on the wall and began slugging it. With a little help from Grandpa (who’s lucky he didn’t get a concussion from Natalie), the spider was no more.

…This was only on my first day in Indy…

updates from around the world

2011-10-28T00:25:00.002+11:00

I guess it depends on which part of the world you are on.

I'm in Colorado...I think. I've been conferencing it up the last week and am ready to be done. Great conference and excellent possibilities but it's always draining. Today is my last day of work-related activities and woke up to a sore throat and that feeling like someone has slugged me with a baseball bat. This wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to pimp my research for 2 hours this morning.

Begin random comment...
I'm in the conference exhibit area watching some guy vacuum the carpet with a Zamboni-like contraption. Fascinating.
...end random comment.

I owe my audience numerous posts about road trips, trans-Pacific travel logs, and who knows what else. I am still getting questions about the mice. Since traveling to Colorado, I have almost burned down a cabin and learned that I am incapable of properly parking cars. My travel experiences are rarely boring. I guess that's why I have a blog.

Anyway, I'll post again soon when things are a bit slower...so maybe in June.

ice cream banter

2011-10-03T11:49:00.001+11:00

Insanely good ice cream

Ok so I know I’m supposed to post about my road trip, but I wanted to write about this little gem of a conversation.

This morning, I had an amusing little exchange with the supermarket clerk about some ice cream I bought.

Clerk: Ooh this ice cream looks really good.

Me: Yeah, it’s very good.

Clerk: Oh you better keep this hidden before someone else eats it.

Me: Well, it’s for a friend.

Clerk: Really? Keep it for yourself. And keep it hidden, my husband would eat this in one sitting.

Me: Well my friend is having a rough time. It’s ok if he eats it in one sitting.

Clerk: Meh, I wouldn’t care if my husband were having a rough time. He should suffer more.

Thank you, lady, for showing me what bitterness can lead to…

NSW/Victoria Road Trip: An Intro

2011-09-29T09:33:00.002+10:00

Oh where to begin?

It began with us driving around the airport trying to figure out how to get the semi-automatic rental car out of first gear.

It ended with us driving around the airport trying to figure out where to get gas without getting lost in the urban jungle that is Sydney.

The middle was great…filled with open roads, unsealed roads, edible snakes, deadly snakes, determined field mice, and more stars than I’ve ever seen.

Below is a summary of the trip. The letters denote overnight stops and the dark blue lines denote state boundaries (sort of…). You have to click on the map to get a better view.

Will post stories in the next week or so.

I need to get a life instead of messing with graphics...

into the great wide open

2011-09-20T22:07:00.003+10:00

A little astro-nerdiness...

I'd be posting more, but I've been pretty much working non-stop...with the exception of some time for babysitting and astrophotography.

I watched Snow White for the first time in...maybe ever?
That movie is kind of weird. I know it was a cinematic feat for its time, but try explaining to a 3 y/o why the queen walks past a jail cell with bones in it. Don't even get me started on the vultures.

My workaholism is taking a brief hiatus. Tomorrow I'm off on a road trip to national parks in the western part of the state. And I'm going with the one person I know who understands the need to plan a trip around the lunar cycle. I am looking forward to open road, clear skies and a beautiful night sky.

Hope to have some good stories when I get back.

why I shouldn't work customer service

2011-09-09T17:22:00.002+10:00

The new lens...it is a beautiful beautiful thing.

Behold, I have emerged from the great unknown…

…otherwise known as my office.

After being gone for a month, work welcomed me with open arms and then smacked me.

For the most part it’s not so bad and I like being busy. Last weekend, I did the college fair day with another PhD student. We were squished between two major departments and were mostly ignored, but it was not without it’s bizarre moments.

Random Conversation:
Woman/Parent: Excuse me, do you have any brochures for the School of Medicine
Me: No, we’re Climate Science
Woman: I know, but their table is so busy I can’t get one of the brochures and was hoping you would have one.
Me: Yeah we only have the Climate Science brochures
Woman: So you don’t have any school of medicine brochures?

I don’t know what I did wrong.

I got out a bit on Sunday and took some pictures, but I am sorry to say that I am bored of the Sydney landscape. Soon I will be off in search of some inspiration.

more natalie-isms

2011-08-29T16:52:00.002+10:00

I am back in Sydney and fighting jetlag with a baseball bat…or maybe jetlag is fighting me with a baseball bat.

Don’t have much to say. Am tired and mentally worn out.

So I shall leave you with a few more Natalie-isms.

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While working at the table, Natalie came up to me with a comb and two hairbrushes.

Natalie: Aunt Laura, we need to straighten your hair so people will stop laughing at you.

What?? You know, people always tell me I have such beautiful hair but I’m beginning to think they sit on a throne of lies.

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On the behavior of roly poly bugs

Natalie: Ok so we let this bug out of the house so he could find his mom. She’s over there, but she’s not moving. I think she’s dead so he’ll have to wait until she’s alive again. He’s going to have to wait forever.

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On boys

Natalie: All the boys in my class want to marry me. But Xander is mean and punched Lucy.

Me: Would you marry Xander?

Natalie (thinks for a minute and grins): yeah

Every girl loves the bad boy.

Natalie-isms

2011-08-16T07:32:00.003+10:00

Don't let their cuteness fool you. Insanity runs in the family.

There is something about chatting with a 3 y/o. They seem to have it all figured out. I wonder when it goes downhill. One of the more entertaining aspects of being home are the conversations I have with my 3 y/o niece Natalie. Marah had her moments too at that age (see the Wedding of Sam and Dino) so I thought I’d mention some of Natalie’s comments.

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Showing Natalie a small hole in my sweater.

Natalie: Aunt Laura! Who did that?
Me: I don’t know.
Natalie: I bet it was Dasher. Dasher, come here!

Dasher is a cat. Apparently he gets blamed for many things…I think he may be the reason for recent trends in sea ice concentration.

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Lunchtime conversation

Natalie: I’m going to have 3 kids.
Me: Who is going to be the dad?
Natalie: They’re not going to have a dad.
Me: Then how are you going to have 3 kids?
Natalie: I’m going to pick them up in my car.

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Afternoon snack

Natalie: Can I have your cookie?
Me: No, it’s too close to your dinnertime.
Natalie: Can I watch you eat your cookie?
Me: Uh, sure…

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On the way home from the park

In the car, a moth flew into the car and was harassing Marah. Natalie’s solution:
Natalie: Stop bothering my sister, moth, or I will punch you in the face!

Strangely enough, the moth did leave.

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While I was getting ready to go out one night, Natalie insisted on choosing my jewelry and brushing my hair.

Natalie: Aunt Laura, you’d better let me brush your hair otherwise you’ll never get a husband.

So my hair is the problem…good to know.

i'm now on the neighborhood watch list

2011-08-12T06:13:00.004+10:00

Hoosier Sunrise...

I’ve been at my parents almost two weeks and I should be getting ready to head back to Sydney, but nothing happens the way it is supposed to. All is fine, just in a holding pattern for a bit longer than anticipated.

In the meantime, I am enjoying the time. The weather has turned nice, I am visiting family and friends and actually get quite a bit of work done. Not to mention the awesome thunderstorms. I never miss Indiana when I visit in the winter, but the summer is different.

I must've gotten 100 pics of lightning from this storm. Absolutely amazing...and yes that is the moon in the upper left.

Now whether Indiana misses me is a different story. The second or third day I was here, I got up early to get some photos of the Hoosier sunrise. You know what I mean, the hazy red sunrise that announces it’s going to be a long hot miserable day. Anyway, I meander around the half-finished neighborhood looking for the best shot and settle down to some serious photography. I’m clicking away when I hear a car pull up behind me… from inside the car came the question “Excuse me, why are you taking pictures of our neighborhood?”. I tried to explain that I was taking pictures of the sunrise, not of the houses, but I don’t think she was buying it. Probably because I was stumbling through words, repeating myself, and basically doing everything to make myself sound guilty of casing the neighborhood. Finally I think I convinced her that my parents live down the street.

Now when I go walking to take photographs, my dad goes with me.

Conversations of a 37 hour travel day

2011-08-04T05:30:00.003+10:00

Highlight of "home": The nieces in a rare quiet moment last Christmas.

3pm: plane
In the seat behind me on the plane, a guy was having the following phone conversation.
Random guy: Honey, can you just tell me what I did wrong so I can apologize for it?...Ok, well I have to go the plane is taking off soon. No…I want to talk to you but you’re kind of pissing me off right now.

11am: Immigration line.
I walked hand over my passport etc and then the agent proceeds to do stare at me, stare at my passport, stare at his screen, and purse his lips. He continues to do this for a minute or so. And what do I do in the face of scrutiny? I start laughing. Finally the agent puts the passport down and smiles.
Agent: Have you lost weight?
Me: Yeah
Agent: No, I mean A LOT of weight?
Me: Yeah
Agent: It shows, you don’t look like your photo much. But that’s great. You look great. What’s your secret?

Ok is he hitting on me? Does he want me to become his personal trainer? Oh please just give me my passport.

United Customer Service
At 1pm, I boarded my flight to Chicago. At 1:05pm, I deboarded my flight to Chicago. That was quick. Pilot did not feel comfortable flying plane due to mechanical issue. Now people got really pissed. I understand the frustration, but if the pilot doesn’t want to fly then I sure as hell don’t want to either. You want to get on a faulty plane, go right ahead. They will provide Darwin awards along with the beverage service.

The flight was delayed 3 hours, putting my connection in jeopardy. So I waited at the Customer Service desk while the agent typed away furiously, shaking his head and pursing his lips. Not a good sign.

The agent and I discuss several options, none of which are appealing but finally agree upon me flying to DC, waiting 8 hours and then flying to Indy. And yes, this was the best option. He starts looking for seats and I zone out. Finally, the agent hands me my tickets and I just look at him blankly.

Agent: You have no idea what’s going on, do you?
Me: None whatsoever.
Agent: Wait, did you fly in from Australia?
Me: I think so.
Agent: I upgraded you to first class for your flight to DC. I think you need it.

The best part of this whole exchange? I had to stand on my tip-toes so I could see over the counter.

3pm: San FranciscoRed Carpet Lounge
Call the parents and let them know they will see me around Christmas some time. Gentleman across from me overhears my conversation and explains that his flight schedule to Copenhagen also got screwed up. We commiserate:
Business dude: So where did you fly in from?
Me: Sydney
Business dude: Not exactly a short flight. Do you know what time zone you’re in?
Me: I don’t even know what day I’m in.
Business dude laughs in response.
Me: It’s Saturday.
Business Dude: Actually it’s Friday
Me: Well I was close.

After I got to DC, the conversations stopped as there was no one else there except the other zombies half asleep on the floor. But I got to Indy the next morning with no problems. No matter how crazy my travel is, it is always worth it when I see the smiling faces on the other end of my travels.

Week in Review...through Thursday

2011-07-28T17:01:00.002+10:00

From many moons ago.

Since Friday is a travel day, I will devote an entire post to that experience.

Whale sightings: One…had to get up at the crack of dawn for it too. Beautiful sunrise though.

Quote of the Week: “I suspect the plush orca is not for me”.

Conversation of the Week (discussion of friend’s application assessment):
Me: It’s pretty ridiculous that they didn’t even have the correct gender.
Friend: Well, I guess that’s just a typo?
Me: They changed your gender. That’s not a typo, that’s an operation.

Meal of the week: Greek salad and a bowl of mashed potatoes.

Dream of the Week: The Hoosier dreamt about a Mexican feast involving several courses of burritos, empanadas, and tostadas. It wasn’t even so much the dream, but the enthusiasm with which she told it. Then she talked about cake…I don’t think she is eating enough.

Number of 6am phone to/from US: Zero…this is good.
Number of 6am text messages: Not zero

Random sighting of the week: A guy wearing a nylon stocking over his face, running across campus…with a guy who did not have a stocking over his face. Not two hours later, I saw someone dressed as a tiger. That one made me completely lose my train of thought. By the time I saw the boys in the women’s lingerie, I was over it.

Days I stayed up past 11pm: 4…however, I was asleep everyday before 10.

Number of times I apologized for insanity: 47.5

distractions

2011-07-20T19:51:00.005+10:00

Lake Te Anau (New Zealand): Taken in February…in spite of everything this was one of the better times of the year so far. That night, I played on swingsets, taught astronomy, and took this pretty picture.

Things have changed a bit since I last wrote and while I think it will still be ok, it’s time for me to head home for a spell. In the meantime, I am doing my best to keep distracted. Being so far away is hard, but I have such lovely supportive friends. They keep hugging me, which is incredibly nice but you know how I am... I guess what I appreciate is that they know too, but do it anyway because I need it.

So today I stole a baby, got manhandled by the German (um, harassment?) and saw the latest Harry Potter.

I barely remember the book or even the last film. Brushing up on either would’ve been a good idea before watching this one. But I still enjoyed it despite the confusion … will maybe see it again after I remember what happened in the last one.

I kind of feel bad for Voldemort. All that power and he still needs a nose job … I’d be bitter too.

I think my favourite character overall is Neville. I’m always a fan of the overlooked underdog (i.e., Sam, Faramir, Wedge*…). He’s a quietly pivotal character, spending most of the time being mocked or ignored, but kicks ass in the end…while wearing the dorkiest cardigan ever. My kind of hero.

I also really liked Snape’s character, which sounds odd. It wasn’t like Hallmark was going to be offering him a job anytime soon. But I appreciate his stubborn persistence to see his promise through.

Ok I’m done rambling about Harry Potter. I didn’t say too much about the movie itself because I don’t know who has seen it. One comment though: I pretty much laughed through the last scene. The special effects were quite good … but the “adults” in the last scene looked liked they just came out of an old Frosted MiniWheats commercial.

…several hours later…

Walking home from the gym, I heard the most profound conversation between two 20-something boys…

Boy 1: Yeah I’ve only ever said “I love to you” to like 4 people including my parents. If I say I love you to a girl, we’re getting married and having kids.

Boy 2: Really, I’ll drop the l-bomb on any girl if I think she’ll have sex with me.

I don’t think Hallmark will be hiring Boy 2 either.

*Does anyone know who I’m talking about?

still here

2011-07-15T14:15:00.003+10:00

Keeping myself busy: rotating tank of water + food colour=nerd-topia

It’s been a while since I last posted. I haven’t really known what to write. Illness is plaguing my family, pestering us with bipolar moments of fear and relief. It has been a rough few months for everyone: we hold our breaths, wait, breathe a sigh of relief, only to hold our breaths again. It's a bit melodramatic but it’s the reality.

I’m not going to give any details, they aren’t mine to give. I am well, although pilates continues to kick my ass on a regular basis…and I walked into a door last night.

It's not easy being so far away, but things have improved and I am feeling optimistic that all will be well. I have fantastic friends who watch over me despite my stubborn insistence that I can take care of myself (except when doors are involved). I keep busy with work, whale stalking, cat staring, and various social shenanigans.

This post is sort of a downer and I am determined to be upbeat. So before you go, enjoy some cuteness.

work week (why are my titles always so lame?)

2011-07-01T16:08:00.004+10:00

This is for Rachel who went to Uluru with me two years ago. She just gave me some great advice today: "Take care of yourself and don't hang out with people who make you feel homicidal".

Mon…

I don’t even remember what happened on Monday. I decided to start this on Tuesday.

Tues…

I know shaking my fist at the computer doesn’t really do anything, but it makes me feel better.

Oh yeah, I must’ve done pilates last night. Or someone punched me in the abs several times.

Why hello, productivity. It’s nice to see you again. I crossed everything off my list today.

Wed...

Hump day: also seems to be “let’s have 17 different moods before 11am” day. It was a rough day. They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger…ok fine, but I don’t want to be a super-hero.

The dentist scares me in a way that absolutely nothing else does. On the bright side, I got a clean bill of health…and a free pass to the cinema for actually showing up to my appointment.

Spin class: two minutes before class, the instructor starts kissing one of her students (no, not me). Is that normal?

Thursday…

A swirlie pink mess of girlie activities. I only worked for about 2 hours but will make up for it this weekend. On the bright side, after 2.5 years of having no idea how to handle my hair in the frizz inducing weather, I decided to get rid of it.

Also, birthday cake and British TV…I love my friends.

Friday...

Am proud of myself for going for morning run at 6am…well I didn’t actually run because of an earphone malfunction (hey, it’s legit), but I walked faster than normal, I swear. The hardest part about early morning runs is not stealing the bread deliveries left on the front steps of the cafes.

I have a degree in Astrophysics and a PhD in Atmospheric Science and in my world, 8+8=14….

I would like to change my calendar to July, but I can’t actually reach it anymore since the German moved it. Thanks, K.

ROT IN H%&@!, MATLAB, AND TAKE YOUR “OUT OF MEMORY” ERROR WITH YOU

And that is all I have to say…

weekend getaway (geez, again?)

2011-06-29T17:46:00.002+10:00

Seriously? Who wants to spend the weekend indoors?

So the birthday was a quiet affair but I was gearing up for a one-night camping trip with the German and her two kids. Her husband wanted to be Canadian and play hockey so I went along to help with the kids, get out of the city, and enjoy the stunningly beautiful weather. This was my first time camping with kids. Definitely a different experience, but not at bad one at all. Her kids are great with each their own strong unique personality: Her daughter (6y/o) is a quiet soul with a perceptive maturity about her that I’ve yet to see in most adults. Her son (almost 4) is a passionate soul with a devout love of trains, planes, and the colour pink.

It being winter, the campsite (just north of Sydney and near the water) was relatively empty except for the crazed campground ranger who loved rules and the word “verboten”…and the wallabies, which far outnumbered the campers. They were not shy creatures either, having no qualms about creeping up behind you in an attempt to steal your dinner. In the dark, comparisons to velociraptors didn’t seem that far-fetched.

They don't look so cute in the dark...

We weren’t there very long but made good use of our time: eating, walking/hiking, and just lying in the sun.

The trip was another opportunity to try some astrophotography. I snuck away after dinner, found a nice perch along the water and got down to the business of capturing the universe spinning. It was my first attempt at star trails and many attempts were made before anything reasonable appeared on my screen. By that time, it was late, cold and the wallabies were beginning to circle, staring intently at me and the camera. Suddenly astrophotography was feeling less like a nerd-hobby and more like a survival sport. I dropped off my gear by the tent, found the bathroom and when I returned the wallabies had surrounded my camera, trying to determine whether it could be used as Thanksgiving dinner.

41-42 min exposure. Sydney light pollution gives it a nice "gradient".

That's all for now...will probably be working the next few weekends but you never know...

blog for a birthday

2011-06-27T21:41:00.003+10:00

Really, all I wanted to do was be nerdy and take photos...First attempts at astro-photography.

Oh good grief I was on cranky on Friday. Is Satan allowed to have birthdays? I don’t think the mood and the birthday are related, I was just moody (most Cancers are). Birthdays don’t bother me, I don’t get depressed at the thought of getting older, but I rarely have the desire to go out and celebrate it either. Other than Facebook, I just don’t mention it…this backfires when my friends here find out that’s my birthday and yell at me for not telling them.

A delightfully random gift left by the Hoosier. He is going to help me tackle the great conundrums of sea ice.

What I like about birthdays is that are sort of a carte-blanche. Do whatever you want because, hell, it’s your day. I’m pretty behind right now so I just wanted to work and then have an evening where I didn’t work. But don’t worry, I have plans to celebrate…just not yet. Besides, people still found ways to make sure I had a proper birthday. The Hoosier left me a little gift in my mailbox, the Brazilian made me eat horribly unhealthy pastries and the German and her family sang me Happy Birthday. I’m even getting a belated birthday cake.

Banana and caramel...

I have such lovely friends…

Ok, in my next post I will be stalked by wallabies who tried to eat my camera. Stay tuned...

snowy mountain getaway

2011-06-23T16:09:00.003+10:00

They look guilty of something (drinking beer?). I wished they would've hopped on the guys in those bags...they were annoying.

A couple of weeks ago, the Hoosier* suggested we go to the Snowy Mountains. Both of us were in some desperate need to get away from the office, so we headed off on a 3-day camping trip. Unfortunately the weather/road closures cut the trip short by a day, but there is something to be said for just getting out of the city and seeing rolling hills devoid of artificial structure.

Highlights

Crazy people:
On the way down, we stopped at a tiny roadside “café” for some coffee. The wait staff was less than pleasant but the food was intriguing. I can cross “pikelets” off my list of foods I never knew existed. But the highlight came as we were paying the bill. The waitress looked intently at us and creepily inquired “Do you like Christmas?” Something in her tone suggested that the only answer was an emphatic “yes”. Upon our agreement that Christmas is awesome, she and another crazy lady began ranting about the great Xmas shop (in a barn) down the street. Now, it’s winter here and they probably thought Americans in search of snow are thinking of Christmas, but I don’t think Santa Claus is as gung-ho as these women. I was half expecting them to drag us out the door and down the street to ensure we saw the Christmas barn. We made our escape and the Hoosier’s comment as we got into the car “I’m really glad we got out alive”. Seriously weird…

Lots of wildlife:
Our first sighting occurred at the turn off to the campsite, an emu and her baby snacking by the side of the road. Kangaroos hopped through our campsite in the morning and scrutinized us on one of our hikes (FYI, kangaroos like to use trails for their bathroom breaks). I imagine they are something like Indiana deer and Colorado elk. We also saw some wombats…they were on the side of the road…they weren’t moving…one had a red cross painted on it…I’m going to assume they were sleeping…

I miss snow. I know it makes me weird but well, what's new...

SNOW:
As the great Lorelai Gilmore would say “everything is magical when it snows”. At the upper elevations, the muddy brown/green terrain transformed into white and for a time on the first evening, we tramped across a snowy trail overlooking a valley filled with gum trees and fading light. There is something so silent and peaceful about snow… except for my cursing as I lost a lens cap.

Beautiful scenery:

The second day, we went for a hike in the rain and learned that the Hoosier’s shoes and my coat are not waterproof. The prospect of wet clothes, cold campsite (no fires), and annoying camp neighbors did not appeal to either of us. Furthermore, one of the roads to was closed, limiting our options for snow hiking. So we opted for an early departure and took the long way back through the north end of the mountains. On this end, the weather was beautiful and the scenery was equally stunning. I took 300 pics in 2 hours. The mountains were not of the Rocky-variety, but oddly enough, the landscape reminded the Hoosier and I of Italy. I would’ve loved to laid down one of those hills and let the day go by with only the battle between the blue sky and white clouds to occupy my thoughts. Maybe next time…

One of my favourites...

*The Hoosier is awesome. Not only has she listened to me cry, whine, complain, and generally freak out over the past 6 weeks, she patiently waits while I snap 20 photos of a rock.

highlights of a monday

2011-06-20T18:39:00.003+10:00

My to-do list for June...this was as of June 15. I suck... I am good officemate and only used the bottom half of the board (mostly because I can't easily reach the top half).

It was a beautiful work-free weekend (unless you count submitting a journal article at 1am Friday/Saturday to be work). Yesterday I roamed the coast and took pleasure in the simplicity of just being. There is something to be said for standing high on a cliff with the sun on your back, the wind in your hair and the sound of the ocean in your head.

Mondays just can’t beat that…though this day has had its moments

- phone call home: Called my dad to wish him Happy Father’s Day. I didn’t have many minutes on my phone so it was a quick chat. But I made it a sentimental father-daughter moment by using the F-word and then apologizing with the d-word. Now you’d just have to know my dad…I learned most of my swear words driving through Chicago traffic with my dad. But I’ve only ever heard him say the f-word once. Happy Father’s Day, Dad, your daughter swears like a truck driver.

I feel like this would be a good time to insert several Ralphie quotes about profanity, tapestries, and Palmolive soap*…

- Banter with the barista: Twice I week I go in for coffee and when he is there, we chat about work, life, the upheaval in Greece, etc. He’s sweet enough to ask me about my job hunt/travels and smart enough to remember how I drink my coffee. It’s damn good coffee too.

- Package shipping: I’ve been meaning to do this since April…Miracles DO happen.

- Pilates: Mondays don’t feel quite right unless you’ve inflicted some sort of torture upon yourself. I chose to go to contortionist class, something I’ve not done in months. There are three levels: easy chick (I’m skeptical of the fact that she never mentions neutral spine), hard chick (I’m skeptical of the fact that she is trying to kill me) and nice chick who gives me several options (except napping). Even so, I’m going to be in some screaming pain in a few days.

* I wonder how many people reading this actually know what I’m talking about.

Lunar Eclipse

2011-06-16T16:19:00.003+10:00

4:58am: Heading to the beach, stopping to snap a few photos of the "full" moon as the Earth eats away at it.

I wasn’t even going to go. All day yesterday, the forecast said rain, the sky said rain, even the neighbor’s cat said rain…but as I walked home last night, the breaks in the clouds were hinting at a clearing for the lunar eclipse. I’ve seen eclipses before and they definitely appeal to the astro-nerd* in me, but it was more the ideal of photographing the eclipse that made me contemplate an anti-cloud dance. Alarm set for 430am (good grief, why can’t good astronomical events occur at 9pm?), I actually got up before that, half-hoping the clouds would send me back to bed. But the moon was evading the clouds, daring me to brave the chance of rain and the weirdos that hang around the beach at 4am.

Armed with my gear (tripod, remote release and oh yeah, the camera), I headed to the beach stopping to chase a cat out of the street and to chat amicably with a local newspaper deliveryman. I’m pretty sure he wasn’t expecting an astronomy lesson from an American at 430am, but he seemed amused.

5:39am: 15min into totality...still rather bright (not deep in the Earth's shadow yet). Stars in the background are part of Scorpius (figures...)

So I went, sat on a hill, took pictures in between the rain clouds and thought deep thoughts…you can’t do anything astronomically related without having profound thoughts about life and the universe. I won’t bore you with the technical details of the photo shoot except to say that I learned fast. I got two 5 min rounds of photos before the rain had it's way.

5:54am: 30 min into totality. As it gets deeper into the shadow, it gets darker and redder (I think?)...also the rain clouds were affecting the colour.

By 7am I was home, uploading photos and on a whim, I sent one off to the Sydney newspaper. Not many people were up that early or willing to brave the rain so the paper might be interested in my shots. Sure enough, I got a reply asking if they could use it in their online story and about 30 min later, I clicked on the website and saw this:

It was a slow news morning...

Yeah…that’s my photo on the front page. Squeals of delight echoed through my apartment. The article itself also contains my photo as well as the credit. I have told just about everyone… I hope people don’t think I’m bragging. It’s really just pure excitement (this is better than my first journal publication). Photography and astronomy are two of my great passions (along with sarcasm) and it’s surreal to see my astro-nerd photo on something other than facebook or this blog. Besides, after the past month, I could use a mood booster.

My dad’s response: That’s very cool. You spent 22yrs in school and now you’ve decided to become a photographer…

It didn’t seem like the time to point out that I actually spent 25yrs in school.

* If I were going to be a super-hero, I’d be Astro-Nerd. I could bore villians to death with my copious knowledge of all things astronomical (Did you know that the mass of the Sun is 2x10^30 kg?)

conversation

2011-06-15T18:34:00.004+10:00

I like kites...I imagine most crazy people do.

I'm still working on the Snowy Mts post. In the meantime, I thought I'd share the following. I started my day with the this online conversation:

DirtBag (his description, not mine): FYI, don't eat benadryl in the middle of the day if you're allergic to. I'm probably going to be too high to drive home. Oops

Me: did you know you were allergic to it?

DB: yes

Me: then you, my dear, are a dumbass

DB: but my hay fever was killing me and I was desperate. Other option was drooling snot all over my keyboard for the rest of the day. given the choices, I don't regret it

Me: but you're telling me not to do it. so what happens if I end up in a similar situation

DB: but probably should've planned ahead given the time of year. I'm hoping you learn from my mistakes and plan ahead

Me: well I don't have hay fever

DB: stash something in your desk that doesn't make you see purple monkeys in diapers dancing across your screeen

Me: I don't like purple so I doubt my monkeys will be such a colour

DB: that's the killer....I hate purple too, but the monkeys didn't ask me first

Me: clearly you are not the master. Are you feeling better now or do you think you're talking to God on facebook chat

DB: I imagine I'm talking to a yellow monkey

Me: yellow? (aside: I’m not sure what is worse…being called a monkey or being called a yellow monkey)

DB: lime green if we're going to be picky (aside: I don’t like lime green either)

Me: you better be nice to the lime green monkey or she won't talk to you anymore

Me: hey do you want to go to Nepal?

The conversation went on for a bit before I was unceremoniously ditched and unkind words were written (I hoped he would be attacked by pink monkeys…being attacked by anything pink is the ultimate insult in my book).

This is actually a normal conversation. It’s the nice conversations in which we actually act as if we like each other that worry me.

everybody needs a theme song

2011-06-09T15:51:00.003+10:00

The other day, I got to work, opened my laptop, and set my iTunes flowing. And as I started up Matlab for another frustrating day fighting the battle of red vs black, the theme song to Star Wars* began marching through my headphones. For a brief moment, I felt empowered with the belief that I could triumph over fatal errors and segmentation faults and meaningful results would cover the screen.

Then the red errors began about 2 minutes later.

And I knew that the dark side had won…again.

Still, it was nice while (can I use 'whilst' here?) it lasted.

In case you are wondering, Oscar the lion is sort of like Yoda and has been gracing my computer since the first year of grad school. He is responsible for 3 of my journal articles.

*Yeah that’s right, I have the Star Wars soundtrack… if that makes me nerdy, then stick a beanie on my head and call me Urkel.

day diary

2011-06-08T21:17:00.002+10:00

Photo is courtesy of The Dirtbag. I asked him for it to use with the storm chasing posts but he was busy having a life so I didn’t get it until now.

Haven’t done one of these in a long time. Am anticipating another 12-hr work day so I may as well drag everyone down with me.

6am: Oh holy…why do I get up this early and why is it so cold?

720am: walking to work, spot Lindt truck. Contemplate chasing it down, but instead head to coffee shop.

8:15am: pace and quietly freak out…

9am: conference call to US. Apologize profusely for time difference as if this is my fault.

1015 am: administrative bureaucracy is ridiculous. Co-worker and I have to fill out risk assessment form to run a spin tank experiment for “college day”. The spin tank is a tiny tank of water that spins…do they think someone is going to drown in it? Or the tank will spin off the platform, knocking someone out?

Noon: Only crossed two items off my list. I think I’m going to start adding “make a list” to my “to-do” list so I can feel more productive.

1230pm: quality time with incredibly cute guy. He thinks I’m pretty awesome.

1:50pm In preparing for meeting with boss to discuss my research, I have brainstorm/epiphany/hypothesis regarding the Brit’s research. Hmmm… Will spend next hour in a seminar contemplating this idea. New ideas are like new relationships …. everything is happy, perfect and no flaws to be found. In science speak, the analysis will be perfect and the results published in Science/Nature. Then reality sets in. Should take a few hours and 2 plots for me to realize my idea was stupid…

320pm: afternoon coffee with the Brazilian and her baby. The baby did not drink coffee…neither did I. Am limiting myself to one coffee in the morning.

4:35pm: The lack of coffee probably explains my lack of productivity for the past 30 minutes.

5:45pm: Got a stern talking-to from boss about working too much. Then he apologized for being harsh. Also gave me much to think about concerning my future. Gah, I hate thinking about jobs... or my future.

6:30pm: Reading sea ice paper and listening to officemate’s computer make strange clicking noises. If it starts talking to me, I hope you will all visit me in the loony bin.

6:50pm: Have been listening to the same two songs all day. By Mumford and Sons…they sound kind of Irish but there is a bluegrass influence in there that I absolutely love.

7:25pm: Hmmm I should eat.

835pm: Should be working but playing with photos instead…

845pm: Job applications…

9:17pm: Screw this, I’m going home.

storm chasing recollections part 4

2011-06-05T22:02:00.002+10:00

This picture has nothing to do with the story but is a sign of things to come...also I ran out of storm pics.

Storm chasing recollections (written August 2002): Part 4

Well after awhile the storm (who we had claimed in the name of Sticky and Eerie) got bored and moved off to the southeast in search of some fun (and the other dwarves) only to die a slow and painful death (it was in Kansas by then so it probably died of boredom). We also noticed another supercell forming behind us. At first being the novice dumbasses that we are, the prospect of having a lightning show on the way back thrilled us both. We started heading north back to Akron, thinking we'd be ok despite my jokes about highways and hell. Once we were back in cell range, Tracy called for a radar update, confirming that we were in a new supercell (which was freaking HUGE ("huge" being pronounced in the scottish accent ala Mike Myers)) and was producing LOTS of CG strikes. But it wasn’t until we ended up in the hail shaft that we realized our decision-making skills could use some work. The hail was about 1in sized and luckily did little damage to my car but it was plentiful and we couldn't see shit. Suddenly Tracy is yelling, "turn around turn around, go south!!" I "quickly" turned around (i.e., a 24-point turn) and started going about 90 mph back toward Anton, the booming metropolis of -6 people. Tracy was turned around watching the storm, apologizing for the hail and then all of the sudden she turns back towards the front completely white (well even more so than she normally is) and muttering something like "Oh God" (ironic given that she is Wiccan). By this time we were both rather freaked out so I didn't think too much of it. But later, once we were safely back in The Fort, she said she was fairly convinced she saw a debris cloud not too far from us. Probably a good thing I didn't know at the time otherwise, I (the girl who never cries) would have gotten hysterical. If it'd been daylight this would have been no big deal but I had an almost feeling of vertigo that I didn't like (I was probably dizzy from my 24-point turn). You didn't know what was coming at you. We wanted to call Gustavo, the Russ', a priest, whoever to get info on the storm but of course we were out of cell reach.

We stopped about 10 mi south of the hailshaft. We were still in the storm but there were no more stones of satan beating upon my car. My jokes about highways/hell no longer seemed amusing and neither of us felt like singing "Highway to Hell" anymore. Anyway, even away from the hail, I kept thinking about tornadoes dropping on us (this literally happened to a friend of mine) so we retreated back to Anton (another 10mi south) which was out of the path of the storm and there was shelter in case it ended up over us somehow. We found out later that there were numerous tornado warnings out on this particular supercell.

The storm passed to the east and we headed back to Akron and then took US34 back to civilization. The trip home was rather uneventful (unless you think me singing "This is the song that never ends" and "Little Bunny FooFoo" exciting). By the time we got to Akron it was 11:30 and so NOTHING was open and by the time we got to the next populated town, even the fastfood places were closed. Thank goodness for soynuts and popcorn. We did watch another storm forming as we drove home but it was far away.

Anyway, I think those are the key highlights of our evening. I'm sorry you guys weren't with us...wouldn't this have made a KICK ASS girls night out? (I thought about taking this last sentence out because, frankly, I sound like an idiot but that is sort of the theme/lesson of the story … also who the hell did I send this to?)
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Thoughts 9 years later…I find it amusing that when I originally wrote this story, I left out the not-too-minor detail that we nearly ran out of gas and tried flagging down a cop car. Kind of stupid, but also kind of funny.

storm chasing recollections part 3

2011-06-03T16:05:00.002+10:00

probably breaking a copyright law by posting this pic, but I have been in love with it since I saw it many many years ago. Astronomy+weather=happy me.

Our first interesting event occurred halfway between Stoneham and Sterling. Up until then we had gotten a few pics of the Cheyenne supercell but were focusing on the Akron cell. Tracy got a gazillion pictures of this (a very photogenic storm). The cross vectorial flow was enhancing the main updraft and the tower in the Front Right Cross-Vertical Flank (also known as FRCVF) was backing ever so slightly to increase the outflow. These were all indicators that this storm was intensifying at a steady rate....ok, you know this is all bullshit but I had to put some technical jargon in here somewhere (I should try this in one of my classes).

Anyway…I noticed that corn? fields were turning white, covered with an eerie mist. While my first thought was "how could it snow in August?", Tracy started squealing like a school girl. I then realized it was hail (Tracy’s MS thesis was on hail). We pulled off to the side of the road to investigate. Newsflash, holding hail in your hand makes your hand cold. As we drove on, a cop (well he had flashy lights on his truck…but no teeth) was directing traffic around a truck that had gone partially off the road thanks to the hail. He warned that as we descended into the valley, we'd encounter really thick fog and 6-8in of hail on the ground. I was alittle apprehensive at this point...the idea of descending into a thick fog, over a bridge with ice all over the road didn't excite me (Honda Civics aren’t exactly known for their all-weather sturdiness). But we did it anyway and emerged unscathed. I felt really bad for the van full of boys that went off the road. Those guys were wearing T shirts and shorts and it was pretty cold there. But at its deepest, we saw hail about 9in deep on the ground. Everyone one we talked to afterwards (e.g the Russ', Sarah) said they'd never seen anything like that before so we felt momentarily superior to the other weather nerds.

Anyway, we went to Sterling, had a lovely bathroom pit stop in what had to be the most disgusting KFC bathroom ever, and headed south on 63 (ok I don't remember the exact directions....Tracy was navigating...I was the fool following without question but we ended up going south on 63). By this time we couldn't see much of the Akron storm due to other wannabe clouds obscuring the view. The air was humid and sticky with a vibe of eeriness that always foretells of ominous weather. For the next few minutes, we discussed that Sticky and Eerie were dwarves that were never given proper credit by Snow White (I bet you thought there were only 7...not anymore). But driving into severe weather in the middle of nowhere…. I was semi-convinced we were going to hell … and then we’d break out into a one-line duet of "We're on the highway to hell" (couldn't remember any other lines of the song).

By the time we got to Akron the sun had set but we were getting better views of the storm (the tops must have been pretty damn high because they were lit long after the sun was gone). The supercell had split into the right and left movers. The right-mover was dominating but ol' Lefty was holding his own too. Awesome lightning views (saw streaks of lightning coming out of the tops of the clouds). As we headed out of Akron, we tuned into one of the tornado warnings issued for this storm (perhaps it was the right-mover that produced this but like I'd know). Having absolutely NO intention of getting too close to the storm (foreshadowing: this wasn’t the storm we should’ve been worrying about), we followed it for awhile and ending up in the middle of nowhere (near Arickaree on 36). The sun was long gone and I was keeping an eye on my gas gauge so we went only 45mi once we left Akron (visions of getting stranded with mass murders lurking in the fields were dancing in my head). We pulled off to side and watched the amazing light show it was producing. Another idiotic observation by good ol' Laura: when we first stopped the car, we noticed something bright on the horizon. Knowing that Arickaree was near, I wisely deduced that it must be a drive-in movie screen in the distance...and then Tracy pointed out that it was the moon. What the hell??? Where do I come up with these things??? (9 years later and I STILL don't know what the hell was going through my head...a drive-in??).

Being the astronomy nerd, I thought the whole view was amazing because while we had storms to the east and north (the latter was pretty far north I thought), the sky above was clear with a millions stars, and to the east the moon was rising up over the horizon under the storm base so that the light was passing through the rain giving the moon a red tint. Absolutely awesome.

Hmmm…this part is a bit boring. Wait until tomorrow when we almost get clobbered by a debris cloud.

storm chasing recollections part 2

2011-06-02T16:03:00.003+10:00

Not a supercell, not in Colorado, and not from August 2002, but it's the best I got.

If you haven’t done so already, read the previous post. It sets the “scene”.

The story below was written in August 2002 and has not been changed from the original. Some recent comments/thoughts have been added in italics.

--------------------------
How My Car was Christened the Handbasket Pt 1

I'm not sure who is on the chaser list, but for those who don't know, Tracy and I went chasing on a whim yesterday and ended up having a successful run. Most of you got the official summary but I thought I'd give you chosen few the true story. Before you get excited, no we didn't see any tornadoes but compared to my last chasing experience, this was like winning the lottery. So here goes....

The day (I believe it was a Sunday) started quietly enough. Actually "quietly" isn't the word for it. I was bored senseless, so much that I spent the afternoon reading some ridiculous romance novel where the hero is so nice, sweet, handsome, and sensitive that he was obviously gay and was using the heroine so he wouldn't have to come out of the closet. In an effort to relieve my boredom, I called Tracy who informed me of the increasing storm activity in the northeast part of the state. Reluctant to go back reading my "novel" which I'm sure had already killed off 20% of my brain cells, I browbeat her into going out for a drive. Neither of us had any intention of actually chasing anything other than some cool clouds. Besides, I wanted to use up the rest of my film so I could develop it finally (you know this story is old if I’m talking about film development). And there is that important fact that neither of us know any about storm chasing, so to actually get under a storm, we'd have to be on crack...you can see where this is headed.

Thus Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Duh started off at around 5:30pm heading east in search of Cu fields and Q vectors (inside joke that would take too long to explain...but it's proper nerd jargon). We caught up with CO-14 and heading in the direction of Sterling without any intention of reaching it. By this time we could see 3 distinct supercells. The one in Cheyenne looked bad enough that even a dumbass like myself knew it wasn't worth pursuing. Another storm out past Sterling that looked promising but far enough away that it lost some of its appeal (the goal was to stay IN the state). And then there was the storm over Akron that Dan and his group followed. Initially, this storm was obscured by some smaller cumulus and other wannabes so it was hard to tell if something good was behind them or if those romance novels really had fried my brain. However, persistence paid off and the clearing of the crap clouds confirmed an amazing storm (I really wish I had these pics in Sydney…it was one badass storm). Tracy said it was a textbook supercell. In an effort to contribute something intelligent, I pointed out the cloud tops were overshooting into the atmosphere...well, DUH, where else would the clouds go? I meant to say “stratosphere” but I seem have this problem of thinking of the most idiotic thing to say and then actually saying it. So much for trying to sound intelligent.... (can you believe I actually teach people now?)

Thoughts of a quick afternoon drive flew out the window. To pass that storm up would be like having (insert your favorite actor, boyfriend, whoever here) ask to (insert favorite fantasy here) and you saying "no thanks, I have to do my Geophysical Fluid Dynamics homework tonight".....you just don't pass up a situation like this.

Stay tuned…

stories from the olden days: recollections of storm chasing

2011-06-01T19:37:00.005+10:00

I apologize for the quality. I have no good storm pics on this laptop so I had to scan an actual photograph.

Given the numerous Facebook posts about storm-chasing over recent days, I am reminded of my very first “successful” outing…back in August of 2002. That was almost 9 yrs ago…and I was in grad school. I can’t decide if that is depressing or not…youth is nice, but as I’ve learned…youth is also quite stupid.

Some background:
Atmospheric Science grad students+Colorado=storm chasing group, a collection of nerds with the collective purpose of witnessing some wicked weather. Some were in it for the science, some just wanted to see a tornado and I suspect some were enthralled with the idea of their own real life Twister moment (insert favourite Twister quote here).

Every April-June, when the SPC would issue a greater-than-slight risk of severe weather anywhere within a 500 mile radius, grad students in our department would suddenly come alive, emerging from the drudgery of computer work and the offices would buzz with discussions of the anticipated chase. Where was the prime spot for initiation, when would the cap break, why the hell do the Cubs suck? (an irrelevant but valid question asked in most situations). Then suddenly the quiet returned as plans were put into action, with a few sad souls left sitting by the phone and computer, ready to provide radar updates (this was before the days of wireless everything). You didn't even have to be involved in the discussions to know it was a good chase day. It was always confirmed by the mass exodus of students, sometimes ducking behind cars so their advisor, who just happened be driving in, would not see them walking out (true story).

After these quests for Dorothy’s transport, it was typical to send an email detailing the chase events: both nerdy (insert technical jargon here) and practical (recommendations on restaurants…the quest for decent food was often as elusive as the quest for the tornado).

I was never very much an active member of this group, so much of these comments are from that of an outsider looking in. But I paid attention and when car space was available I tagged along. No one much cared about my opinions so I usually sat in the backseat, editing papers, presentations or doing counted-cross stitch (I was an old lady even at 24).

Overall, I never had much luck with storm chasing. I am the kiss of death for severe weather…Kansas must love me when I go chasing. But I have seen some interesting things and had some amusing experiences, perhaps none so much as my first “successful” chasing experience. The report my friend and I sent to the chase group was devoid of the amusing details…so I wrote my own version for some friends. It took some searching but I finally found it last week (being up at 3am does have a purpose). This was really my first attempt at “creative” writing…except for the story about Max the leprechaun that I wrote at age 6 (that literary masterpiece is unlikely to be surpassed).

Stay tuned…I’ll start posting story tomorrow and after. By the way, I’m not advocating storm-chasing. For the most part it’s a dangerous idea and only those that know what they are doing should be doing it.

But I was young and stupid…

why i haven't been blogging

2011-05-31T14:26:00.004+10:00

Apparently we think much better using the whiteboard. And no, the phrase "crazy shit" did not end up in the manuscript...I don't think.

2 scientists+1 paper+massive edits+strict deadline=4 day writing marathon

I don't even remember my name anymore...it's Billy right?

I've been working on some recollections of my storm-chasing days. Much more interesting and hopefully will be posted soon.

cameras and cartography

2011-05-24T19:07:00.003+10:00

A park in the Sydney CBD: several of the stores there now have all of my money.

I am sitting at work, needing a break and wanting to go home but too wimpy to walk in the rain.

I’ve decided to stop linking the blog to facebook. It’s a little too “HEY LOOK AT ME!!!”. I started doing it for the NZ trip, but it’s turned into a bad habit. I figure if people are interested, they will check back or put me in the bookmarks, RSS, google reads, whatever.

I know I promised you all some crazy antics but all I’ve done so far is whine and bitch. Skydiving next week, I promise.

So far all I’ve done is engage in retail therapy. But not girlie retail therapy consisting of shoes, makeup and clothes. No, no. I still cringe at the thought of spending more than $100 on a pair of shoes (unless they’re hiking or running shoes because then they have a purpose). Instead, I choose to support the economy via photography and cartography.

The camera store is always dangerous, consisting of sirens (no, not the ones on police cars) in the form of zoom lens and gorilla pods softly calling my name. I went in for one item and came out with 4. But thankfully I left the oh-so-pretty $600 lens in the display case.

But the antique map store was too much of a temptation. I spent an hour flipping through the stacks of old maps, watching people’s perception of the world change. And then I found one that combines my love of cartography with my love of astronomy. How could I resist? I think I my girlie genes were substituted with uber-nerd ones.

It was cheaper than the lens anyway.

Ok I’ll stop blathering on, but will you leave with this little conversation:
Hoosier: Do you want a party for your birthday?
Me: No, I don’t want to celebrate being 33.
Hoosier: Why not? Being 33 is awesome.
Me: Why?
Hoosier: Because you’re a third of the way to being 100.
Me: Yeah, that’s not helping.

comic relief

2011-05-22T17:27:00.003+10:00

Don’t worry, folks. The neighbor’s cat is watching out for me.

The sad thing is that I actually took several photos of the cat, looking for the right angle. My photography obsession borders on neurotic sometimes.

Anyway, this blog needs some amusement.

The best distraction from my woes of the world? The semi-annual field trip. Picture 250 exchange students (mostly American), still hungover from the night before herded off and on buses for several hours, while listening to mini-lectures on the oceanography and marine science of the region. It’s sort of a thankless job, but I will always help out the other Hoosier (who runs the class), and it is such rich assortment of characters that whine, charm, and groan their way through the field trip. If I were in their shoes, I’d probably be a pain in the ass too, so I can’t blame them. But they make an effort to listen (we have the answers) and every once in awhile they show some interest in the subject.

And above all, the conversations are priceless. There was a group of American lads sitting behind us on the bus, having every possible conversation one could have over the course of one morning. I heard words/phrases such as: Jews, Pomeranians, born-again virgins, horse-back riding…would’ve been more interesting if that was all included in one story.

Thank God I am not a 20 y/o…

Best quotes:

From aforementioned conversation: “Dude, you should see Billy on ‘shrooms”.

“Damn, this field trip is long, they’re getting back at us for never going to class”.

Guy to girl: “Hey, if I jump in the water, will you give me your clothes so I won’t catch cold?” (She didn’t fall for it)

A pathetic attempt at trying to get the answers from me: “hey if you just gave us the answers now we could get done early and I could show you a much better way to spend the afternoon…”

Random quote I saw on Facebook that has nothing to do with this post: “I’m going to straight to hell with kerosene panties”.

in which i bitch about florists

2011-05-19T17:13:00.003+10:00

View from my window...I swear it wasn't this purple.

Really, if I’m going to keep getting up at 5am*, I need to do something. If there are any early morning people reading this, what do you do at this hour?

Anyway, I know I’m worrying people but seriously I’m ok. I’m entitled to a complete wig out now and then. Just a bit too much for me. I believe the last time I did that was the day I left for Australia…that one was witnessed by family, airline staff, and security guards in multiple countries.

Everyone has been lovely and I will always be thankful for such great friends.

I didn’t really say it before but my grandmother died this week. In many ways, it was a blessing and I hope she is at peace…but still, you mourn. I think that is all I’m going to say about that for now.

On a side note, I have been searching for flowers and oh good grief do florists give the most ridiculous names to their arrangements. Some are nice and descriptive like “lavender basket” or “lily and rose tribute spray”…others sound like a hallmark card on crack: “Loves Tapestry” or “Ever Upward” or “Meadow of Memories”.

Maybe my rant is a bit inappropriate, but seriously?

Thank you, Rachel, for helping me pick out flowers. Because seriously, I have no idea.

*Didn’t post until late afternoon, but I started early.

ramblings for an insomniac

2011-05-15T05:19:00.002+10:00

This will be me later...

I’m starting this at 4:44am after an hour of laying awake in bed … why don’t I have insomnia the mornings I want to get up early to watch planetary alignments and such? I feel like I’m wasting my insomnia…I should be saving these days in case I ever have babies. I’m told it doesn’t quite work that way, but still I can hope.

And for reasons I will never understand, I can never sleep if I’ve been out drinking. This is my problem tonight. I don’t understand why. Normal people drink, go home, pass out, wake up and eat mac n cheese. Except me…I get up ridiculously early, watch the sunrise, do laundry, go for a hike (this is today’s agenda)…or hop on a plane to the US…I really don’t recommend the last option.

Since my parents are reading this, I will insert a disclaimer in which I promise that I was not out very late and didn’t do anything stupid. However, sometimes I wish I would stay out later and watch other people do stupid things…this is how I end up with a treasure trove of good gossip.

The other night I was out with some co-workers and they were talking about there is no good gossip at work. I just laughed. This tends to freak people out because they beginning wondering what I’ve heard about them. In this instance, after futilely prodding me for information, they proceeded to add to the treasure trove.

It took me about 15 min to figure out how to spell “futilely” because I was too stubborn to look it up. Sort of the female equivalent to men never asking for directions.

Oooh just looked out the window and the planets are still aligned…but in a very different order than last week. I am a nerd at all hours…both day and night.

Maybe I’ll go down to the beach for the sunrise.

astro-nerd

2011-05-12T09:48:00.000+10:00

I get really irritated when people take long “breaks” between blog posts. I mean, it’s not very considerate to leave me with nothing to do but work. Of course, it being two weeks since my last post, I’ve now become that person. I just don’t have much to say. For the most part, the blog is meant for the more amusing aspects of my life and I leave the rest for therapy (aka morning coffee breaks with my friends). But there hasn’t been much in the way of amusing anecdotes…haven’t done anything ridiculously stupid lately. I’ve become to used to life in Australia. I need to move to another country where I will do many moronic things, thus providing plenty of fodder for the blog.

Last week I went to the Sydney observatory. Astronomy has always been a passion of mine, but I long ago (during the last year of my Astrophysics degree) realized that I am too stupid to make a career out of it. For those of you irritated by this self-deprecation, I’m not joking. I even misspelled it on my resume once…that’s a sign. Anyway, I moved on to other things, but the passion remains and I am always happy when I can drag others into my astro-world.

The tour itself was rather cheesy…although I appreciated the way our guide bluntly told the group that Jupiter’s moons were named after women Zeus assaulted…that’s not how my first grade teacher explained it. But the main point of the trip was to see the telescopes. At first the clouds were going to ruin our chances, but then it cleared enough so the astronomer could show us a star and Saturn. I don’t know why he wanted to show us a star…a star through a telescope isn’t much different than with the naked eye. Hey…it’s a ball of light. However, Saturn is beyond cool. Actually Saturn was one of the first objects I ever saw through a telescope (when I was 16)…that and the Horsehead nebula.

Spurred by the excitement of the observatory, I got up at 4am a few mornings later to see 4 planets huddled together in the predawn sky, waiting for the sun to rise. It was also during the Eta Aquarid meteor shower. I, being the stealth observer of the night sky, saw no meteors.

Venus, Jupiter, Mercury...and if you take a shot of whiskey and squint your eyes, you can also see Mars.

I could go on and on…

If I'm going to be up that early, might as well watch the sun rise.

tribute

2011-04-27T06:30:00.001+10:00

What I remember most about Leslie is her laugh. A unique combination of guffaw and giggle, it was kind of crazy but in this endearingly sweet way. You had to have heard it to know what I mean. I used to tease her about it all the time, but I don’t think she minded. In fact, I think she would just laugh more.

But that was Leslie. I don’t think she ever thought too much about whether she was “cool” or if people liked her. She worried about school and boys and all other issues plaguing the mind of a teenage girl, but yet she walked with a quiet confidence of someone who would never think to act on pretense. She was her own person and unfailingly kind to everyone around her.

Perhaps it sounds like I’m describing someone who didn’t exist, the goldening of a friend who has died and only the best qualities are remembered. I guess that’s true to some extent, but no one who knew her could deny that she was absolutely lovely person.

I was living in Colorado when she died and we hadn’t talked much since her wedding, both immersed in our own lives. But for many years, she had been a part of my life, wrapped up in my memories of growing up.

We met the summer I turned 10, having been assigned to the same softball team in which she was the pitcher…and I was somewhere in right field, making wreaths out of dandelions. And so began a 15-yr friendship spanning high school, college and beyond. In some ways, much of it is a blur, specific conversations hard to remember because you’re young and don’t think about how important friendships are. But certain things will forever stand out. I remember that she was almost foot taller than me and would often use my head as an armrest. She was one of the few who indulged in my love of playgrounds…even after college. The way she pronounced my last name. I remember goofing off at the salon on the morning of her wedding (still have a picture of her and her sis trying on wigs). The way we’d both go nuts at IU basketball games. She bought me my first “legal” drink as a 21y/o.

I’m starting to ramble…you get the picture. She was cool and I could always just be my usual-slightly-crazy-self around her.

It is hard not to be sad this time of year and not to be a little angry at the world for the manner in which she died. I often think about her family, knowing there is very little to say that might be comforting. But I hope they know that she is missed, she won’t be forgotten, and I am so glad I knew her.

weekend pt 1

2011-04-24T07:07:00.008+10:00

Second post in a week?? Don’t you feel special…

It is Day 2 of the Easter weekend. Traditionally, it is a 4 day weekend used to get that last bit of vacation before settling into the dreariness of winter. This year Easter and ANZAC day have joined forces to further lengthen the weekend, but having just come back Tasmania, the US, NZ, etc…I am staying put. Supposed to be working but…

Thursday night: Girls’ night
To say that people have been stressed out lately would be an understatement. In-laws, paper revisions, job hunts, and professionals of a “less-than-mature” attitude have all contributed to glazed, tired look in my co-workers eyes. So we decided to start the weekend in proper fashion with drinks/dinner in the city.

Drinks were in a bar on the 36th floor of the Shangri-La hotel. This place is all about the “aerial” view of the harbour on a clear night. The quality of the view is reflected in the price of the drinks but it’s worth it. I did, however, insult the bartender by asking if he knew how to make a Long island Iced Tea. Really, it was a valid question given that it was the weakest long island I ever had. Even without eating a proper meal beforehand, I could still walk and feel my lips. Pathetic. We moved back down to the ground floor, consuming beer and pizza at a few pubs in the Rocks. Had a respectable hangover the next morning.

The next two days are better explained in pictures… actually I’m sure Thursday would’ve produced some amusing photos but I wisely left my camera at home.

Friday: Manly
Went exploring around Manly, looking for secret trail. Thought about making my own trail to the bottom of the cliffs but realized I would just become the proud owner of a Darwin award.

Wandered around for awhile and then found a nice secluded spot to read, brood, and watch the world go by.
Sunset on the harbour. I never walk back until then. By the time i get back to the beaches and esplanade park, the crowds are gone and I can peacefully watch the sunset lights fade into night lights.

Saturday
Forecast was partly cloudy. Went to Blue Mts.
Partly cloudy, my ass. Fog and mist the whole time.

It was fine though because after 2 years, I have finally found autumn again. Loved every second of it. Tons of pretty colours.

It reminded me very much of home and I a bit homesick right now.
I got drenched in the fog/mist but it was worth it.

There was an ampitheatre to my left that contained practising clowns.

Which road to take?
I took both...

The remainder of the weekend
Work…but maybe from home…in my pjs.

Wrote the last bit on Sat night. It’s Sunday morning and I woke up to a beautiful skies. Maybe I’ll work tonight.

Tasmania: the combative state

2011-04-22T08:39:00.004+10:00

Now that my trip to New Zealand is over, I have gone on two other trips since then. Good grief, do I actually work? Actually, one trip was work-related. Another 3 day workshop in the US. For some reason the exhaustion associated with a 3 day trip to the other side of the world surprised me and I had thought this exhaustion would be cured by another trip to Tasmania.

I am a moron...

Tasmania itself was beautiful. Lovely weather, pretty autumn colours, stunningly blue skies, blah blah blah. What was not so beautiful were the two exhausted people who decided to travel together. I’ll leave the details to your imagination…I hate fighting, I’m not good at it, and my temper gets me into too much trouble.

Anyway, it’s good to focus on the positive side of things. So here are the highlights:

- Wineglass Bay hike: The Brit and I have given up trying to hike together and just move at our own pace (mine was about the same of a comatose slug). But I rather enjoyed the time to myself, seeing no one else on the trail but wallabies and a random couple who complained of the mosquitoes and then offered biscuits (cookies).

Wineglass Bay

- Nightsky photography on the beach: I don’t think I have ever seen so many stars before…at least not since the days of Hayward and that was a different season and hemisphere. The Brit was armed with my tripod, a remote release for his camera and a fierce determination to capture the sky.

The Brit's time lapse exposure of the Southern Cross.

- Scrambling on boulders around Bay of Fires: At this point in the trip, the Brit and I were both contemplating the best way to snuff out the other, but a tentative truce had been called and we spent the afternoon climbing over huge orange-lichen covered boulders (hence the name). Pictures were rubbish (ironically there was a fire near the bay of fires), but still fun.

Bay of Fires. The orange on the rocks is lichen.

- The cheese farm: located on this tiny where-the-hell-are-we-going road that offered no other destination other than some waterfalls at the end, it was the only reasonable option for lunch. Sat on the patio, drinking coffee, consuming scones and watching the cows roam about vividly green pastures and rolling hills. Next to the stars, this was my favourite part of the trip. For about 10 min, I felt absolutely relaxed, content and at peace with the world.

In the end, the trip was a bit of a disaster…the Brit and I are barely speaking, I injured myself pretty badly (god I’m old…and klutzy), and I wasn’t even that happy with my photographs.

But still…I’d move to Tasmania in a heartbeat if it weren’t so damn complicated.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: the last one

2011-04-15T06:17:00.004+10:00

How long has it taken me to write about this darned country? I’ve already been on two other trips since then.

I don’t think much happened in the last day we were in New Zealand. Drove in the rain to Christchurch, ditched the car (damage-free!) and walked around the city a bit. Spent a lot of time in the botanic gardens taking pictures of flowers…seriously it was the Brit’s idea not mine.

The thing that stands out most in my mind was that we were there 2 days before the earthquake and I am quite thankful we got out when we did. Mostly I think about the people we met there and hope that it wasn’t too bad for them. Particularly the taxi driver who lectured us on the evils of technology and then mocked the Brit for having more luggage than me.

The trip seems like ages ago...kind of was. I’ve been on two trips since then, am worn out, and kind of wishing to be sitting on the lakeshore in Te Anau, scrutinizing my photographs and pondering the universe (can you tell things sort of suck right now...won't bitch about that until next post though).

People have asked me what my favourite part of New Zealand was but I don’t have a specific answer. My favourite part was this: that nothing was what I expected. Everything was kind of a lovely little surprise and I could just immerse myself in each experience...whether it was walking on a glacier in the pouring rain admiring the blue-ness of the ice, or standing on the bow of a ship in Milford Sound, learning to properly use my polarizing filter and enjoying the absolutely beautiful day or tramping through Mt Cook National Park, staring at all the glaciers and patiently waiting for a view of the mt itself as the clouds cleared. I loved getting know the quirks of another person but not hating each other’s guts by the end of the trip.

Anyway so that’s the trip.

TRIP SUMMMARY
Distance traveled:
2385km...distance traveled with me behind the wheel: not 2385km

Number of time the Brit yelled “what the hell are you laughing at now??”:
4,564…never had a good answer

Number of times I turned on windshield wipers by accident:
5?

Loaves of garlic bread eaten:
7…seriously it has become a weird requirement of our travels

Key food staples:
tim-tams, potato chips, gummi worms and some bananas, cherry tomatoes and carrots so we weren't completely unhealthy

Gallons of ice cream consumed:
X...I think people would lose respect for me if I gave an actual number.

Number of horribly tacky souvenirs purchased:
1…it’s depressing how easy it is to find tacky souvenirs

Number of times I asked the Brit if the car was locked:
37…after awhile he wisened up and just waited until I was looking to lock the car so I would stop asking.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: recollections

2011-04-06T05:22:00.003+10:00

Sorry for the NZ hiatus. Last week was such a crazy, packed, exhaustive week of meetings that I don’t even remember being in New Zealand … not even entirely sure of its geographic location anymore.

Hooker Valley in Mt Cook National Park. They are rumours that mountains live around here somewhere.

It for reasons like this that I am glad I kept a travel journal. I flipped through it last night to remember what the Brit and I did after Queenstown. We spent one full day exploring Mt Cook National Park (tallest mountain in NZ) and there are plenty of things I remember. A cloudy grey day that didn’t allow much rain but didn’t allow much sunshine either. Glaciers creeping down the mountainsides, glaring out from under the clouds. Relatively flat terrain that made hiking with the Brit less combative. A valley surrounded by mountains that were enshrouded by clouds but for the occasional crack in the sky. During one of those glimpses, we argued for several minutes on whether we were actually looking at Mt Cook.

A rare glimpse of Mt Cook...at least we think it is.

After Mt Cook, we got coffee in some old lodge, talked about who-knows-what, and then headed to Lake Tekapo. I don’t remember anything about that place except for the cool church and the Brit making me drive home. No one died. The only thing I remember about the town we were sleeping in (Omarama) is that its population comprised mostly of ducks.

Not much else besides the church...

But in looking over the journal entry there were several things I don’t quite remember and failed to expand upon in the journal. Just random notes scribbled in the margins, designed to create confusion:

- “Bridge, screaming tourists”….every time I see the word screaming, I wonder if it’s a reference to my driving. I’m guessing it is actually in reference to the two swing bridges on our hike. People (ok, let’s be honest, dizzy females) would start walking on it and then act like were about to re-enact the bridge scene from Temple of Doom.

- “Worse cookies ever”. I must’ve blocked out this traumatic experience. I remember TimTams, which I don’t like but was eating the Brit’s stash just to piss him off. But I think this is something else entirely.

- “The Brit ran over woman in Lake Tekapo”. I hope this isn’t really true because they probably wouldn’t let us back in New Zealand.

Actually that last comment reminds me that the Brit had his issues with the car as well. In Mt Cook NP, the Brit was trying to flip on his brights to motion the oncoming traffic that they had the right-of-way. Instead, he gave his windshield a nice cleaning. Both me and the passengers in the oncoming car had a good laugh over that one…

One more NZ post...I think.

Sorry!

2011-03-28T11:45:00.002+11:00

Blog hiatus...unless I get a chance to post this afternoon. Will be back in a week! Maybe someday I will finish talking about NZ.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: from neurotic to insane

2011-03-22T07:31:00.003+11:00

The rest of our time in Te Anau were pretty uneventful…I didn’t drive so the streets were safe. We spent one day hiking along a nearby lake. It was the one time the Brit and I got into a fight…we walk at very different paces (given a height difference of wellover a foot, this is not a shocker) and have different philosophies on how this should be handled. I hate holding people up and despise people waiting for me. Anyway, the Brit was smart and just let me be pissy about it until dinner, we talked and life goes on.

Lake Manapouri Hike: Every hike should begin with skull-marked sign

Of all the towns we stayed in, Te Anau was my favourite. Situated on the edge of New Zealand’s largest lake, the path from hotel to town followed the lakeline with views of forest-covered mountains surrounded it on three sides. Rather than sit in the hotel room in the evening, I roamed along the shore, happily getting lost in my introspective world. When I do this, I tend to lose track of time and the Brit began to wonder if I’d been carried off by a swarm of sandflies. The next night he came along and we photographed the sunset, played on a swingset (yes I am 9), and contemplated the universe under a starry sky, prompting the Brit to realize his career is pointless. Given that we do research together, this doesn’t bode well for joint publications.

The Brit's photo of Lake Te Anau. It's pretty ugly.

It was in Te Anau that I finally began to relax…and that’s when I started laughing…a lot…for no particular reason. We’d be sitting in dead silence, I would remember something vaguely funny, start laughing, causing the Brit to yell “what in the bloody hell are you laughing at now??” I think at some point, he started wishing I had driven off the bridge.

After Te Anau, we spent one morning in Queenstown before heading back towards the Southern Alps. Queenstown was bustling, full of energetic people on the brink of doing something stupid like soaring through the air attached to a glorified sheet (i.e., parachute) or jumping off a bridge, confident in the ability of a piece of stretchy string to keep them from plunging in the river below. Our limited time allowed us to contemplate such activities without having to actually engage in them.

Queenstown

I promise to finish up the New Zealand posts soon… only two more to go, I think.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: don’t let neurotics drive on the ‘wrong’ side

2011-03-15T06:40:00.003+11:00

The Brit was unaware of this rule and suggested I drive to Milford Sound, the jewel of the Fjordlands two hours away. It seemed like a good idea…it was early, few cars on the 2-lane road, and the route lazily curved through the hills and forests.

Inevitably, I got stuck behind an RV (a ubiquitous part of NZ travel), got the guts to pass him, announced my intention (so the Brit wouldn’t think I’d forgotten the proper side), went to flip on the turn signal…and proceed to turn on my windshield wipers. DAMN foreign cars with everything on the opposite side!! Suddenly, I am simultaneously trying to turn off the windshield wipers, find the turn signal and pass a vehicle without getting hit by oncoming traffic. This doesn’t seem like a big deal but when nothing is where is should be…

Unexpectedly mountainous

Next came the one-lane bridge (almost as ubiquitous as the RV). It is amazing how being on the other side of the road completely messes with your ability to judge width…I was worried about hitting the bridge on my side…and instead went up on the curb on the Brit’s side and came within an inch of hitting the side view mirror. At this point, the Brit started fearing for his life…according to him I almost drove off the bridge entirely. The road stopped being lazy as we transitioned from hills to mountains, and then came the one-lane tunnel. When the traffic lights are working, the tunnel is kind of cool. But before 9am, the lights areoff and you have to determine that no one from the other side is coming before entering the tunnel. Given that the tunnel is 1.2 km long and descends through 7 circles of hell (seriously it was steep), I have no idea how this determination is made. Technically we had the right of way, but not sure what good that does if you realize too late there is a truck heading up the tunnel. But somehow it works and anyways, there was a car in front of us that would’ve gotten hit first (a small but strangely reassuring comfort).

All in all, it wasn’t horrible, but probably not the ideal first drive for a spaz like me. We made it to Milford Sound in one piece and hopped on a boat to get a closer look at the fjords. I don’t know what I was expecting but it was not this. A narrow channel of water surrounding by stunning mountains, some covered in green but many devoid of everything but stone and an occasional glacier. Wherever we looked, waterfalls were in our eyesight, ranging from trickles to roaring cascades. Fur seals lounged, penguins swam and everything glowed under beautiful blue skies. I have seen fjords in Alaska and they were beautiful, but these were something different. You just have to go and see for yourself.

These photos do not do it justice...

Afterwards, we meandered around the fjords on foot (not too many places to go that don’t require climbing gear) before driving to Te Anau, stopping numerous times to explore some trail, waterfall, or “mirror” lake with no reflective properties in the afternoon wind.

Needless to say, I made the Brit drive.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: in which I pass my "luck" onto an unsuspecting soul

2011-03-10T21:28:00.005+11:00

Ah Valentines Day. That most romantic of days that you spend with that special someone and “keep the essence of love in your heart alive”.

HAHAHAHA

Not on this trip…first of all the Brit and I are friends and more prone to punching each other than anything romantic. Second, I hate Valentine’s Day with a passion. If you’re single, you feel pathetic, if you’re coupled, you feel pressured to provide romance at the expensive of your pocketbook or your waistline.

Fox Glacier

But I’m not a cynic…oh wait, yes I am. Besides, V-Day has never been good to me. Not in a romantic sense, just bad luck…more like a Friday the 13th smothered in PeptoBismal.

The nice thing about traveling was that I mostly forget the days, including this most evil of holidays. We woke to overcast but precip-free skies but by the time we were arrived at Fox Glacier, the sun had graced us with its presence. We tramped along, happily snapping photos until the Brit realized one of his lenses had some major condensation issues due to the rain of the previous day. It also didn’t help that he had been attacked by a swarm of sandflies (evil mosquito-types that can turn any beautiful location into some Hitchcock-like nightmare). And then I made him drive 8hrs.

Knight's Point Lookout along the west coast of New Zealand.

The drive to the fjordlands was a beautiful, albeit long, trek south. The route slides along the coast before slipping through the Southern Alps and then winding along some of the most beautiful lakes I have ever seen. However, after 6 hours of driving, the Brit was about done. As an American, driving 6+hrs is nothing (believe it or not, I’ve driven 12 hrs on my own before), but as the Brit pointed out, one could get across England in 6 hours. Long story short he was not a happy camper. I should’ve offered to drive, but for me VDay+car=certain death. This is why you shouldn't travel with a co-worker. Once they realize you are insane, there's no going back.

Lake Hawea (taken by the Brit). One of my favourites because it doesn't look
like it should exist and yet we were there.

We made it Te Anau in one piece, dropped our gear and headed out for garlic bread (and some other food). It was at this point that the Brit discovered a sharp pain in his side and decided he was dying.

Actually if anyone had bad luck this year, it was the Brit.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: can’t think of a good title because I am lame

2011-03-07T09:10:00.003+11:00

Franz Josef reminded me of Alaska. Probably because the only other place I’ve ever seen glaciers was in Alaska. Vaguely touristy (although nothing compared to American standards), it had a cozy charm to it and had the clouds not been so “cloudy”, the glacier-filled mountains would’ve been impressive. We weren’t spending much time there, just one day playing on the glaciers. The first evening was precip-free so we were able to walk to town, gorge ourselves on garlic bread and gossip, and get back before the mother nature unleashed a torrent of rain that did not stop until we left almost 36hrs later.

Franz Josef Glacier. One of 4 photos I could take without ruining my precious camera.

Unable to cancel our hike on account of the rain, the guide company outfitted us with enough rain gear to make us look like ticks ready to pop (name that movie quote!) and set off for the glacier. Even in the rain, it was an impressive sight walking through the valley towards a large sheet of ice that is ironically surrounded by rainforest, mountains and an ocean less than 100km away (I can’t remember how this is possible, you’ll have to ask the Brit). Incidentally this is the location of the famous “Lighting of the Beacons” scene from Return of the King. It’s a good thing they weren’t lit on a shitty day like that. Gondor would’ve been screwed.

Crappy photo but you get the idea.

If anything has ever highlighted my complete lack of trust in the world, it was stepping onto oh-so-slippery ice with a pair of crampons. They warn you about avalanches, rockfalls, and everything else that half-convinced me to run screaming in the other direction…and then attach a pair pointy metal things (crampons) to your boots and send you on your way. I refused to believe the crampons would prevent me from sliding into oblivion and therefore walked very cautiously, grabbing any nearby object, of which my only options were other people and more ice. Hanging onto random people seemed like bad manners (even for an American), but the irony of clutching to ice to prevent one’s self from slipping on ice is not lost on me. The Brit had no such problems and scampered about with little concern, reveling in his love of all things glacial and nerdy (and photogenic). But despite the rain and the lack of pictures, it was an amazing experience, sliding through crevices and feeling immersed in blue ice.

Pathetic attempt to dry out. Note the camera manual, money, wallet, camera gear and various other items that should probably never get wet.

We got back to room and realized everything on us was wet including food, money, and camera gear. This last was a potential trip-killer as any severe camera malfunctions would’ve resulted in a catatonic state of depression. I spent the evening patiently separating the pages of the Brit’s sopping camera manual so his photographic genius could further evolve (not that anyone actually reads the manual). How was my kindness repaid? I made the mistake of falling asleep while the Brit left to find internet. He announced his return by banging on the glass front door and shamelessly enjoyed scaring the %@&$! out of me.

I paid him back by almost driving off a bridge.

More on that later.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: Car Talk

2011-03-03T21:30:00.003+11:00

Marlborough Region (should be vineyards in here somewhere)

The one aspect of the trip that worried me was how the Brit and I would get along. A mutual love of photography and insults have made us kindred spirits of sorts, but we are co-workers and there’s nothing like a holiday-gone-wrong to make the office an awkward environment. 8 days is a long time to spend with another person and God knows I am not an easy person to travel with (I imagine people around the world are nodding their heads in agreement with this statement).

On that first morning of our travels, we tried to sneak out of the hostel without catching the notice of the crazy lady, but no such luck, she cornered us in the parking lot and described a road to the east coast that was so narrow and canyon-like that it would make us commit suicide. (um yeah if I was in a car with her for a prolonged period of time, I would probably drive off a cliff).

COWS! I was kind of hoping for a sheep crossing.

After running away from the craziest woman we’d meet in New Zealand, we encountered the meanest woman in New Zealand, the car rental agent. Thoroughly annoyed that we arrived 30 min early (which she bluntly mentioned), she sped us through the rental agreement, handed us the keys and shoved us out the door. Our transport was a tiny Hyundai Getz. We were surprised to get an automatic, which increased the likelihood of my getting behind the wheel as I have never driven a manual and a rental vehicle hardly seems like the best learning tool. However, the Brit’s vehicular experience has only been with a manual. He made the transition easily (not that he had a choice), but did spend much of the first day muttering about the non-existent clutch. That he is well over 6ft and could barely fit in the car was often a subject of amusement for me (who could probably drive a Barbie ‘vette).

Once we got out of town, I started looking over the rental agreement and realized that while I had thought we had gotten car insurance, we had, in fact, gotten none. Normally, this wouldn’t bother me too much, but given that I’d never driven on “that” side of the road, car insurance seemed like a lifeline of sorts. So what’s the first thing you talk about when you get into a car with no insurance, one driver with no experience on the “wrong” side of the road, and the other driver had to be slightly contortionist just to get into the car? Yeah, that’s right, we exchanged stories about car accidents. Neither were very serious, but the Brit did notice that I would clutch the door on occasion when he took the curves too wide.

Ominous signs for the next day

Despite my worries that Brit and I would piss each other off after a few hours, we managed to keep each other entertained for most of the drive. Intervening lulls in the conversation were filled my silent scenarios involving 200 ways to wreck the car and be forever indebted to EuropCar. The scenery wasn’t extraordinary but it was lovely to be outside of a city. The first half wound through wine country, strangely reminiscent of Italy, before giving way to more mountainous terrain obscured beneath the lowering clouds. It did not bode well for our glacier hike the next day.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: Picton and the Poster Child for “Just Say No”

2011-02-28T23:01:00.004+11:00

Our journey from north to south islands

I sort of thought that as soon we stepped onto the ferry to the south island that the stress of the past month would simply slide away and I would relax. But neurotics don’t work like that. The Brit, who had spent the past 5 weeks on a ship, was happy to watch the world go by from one of the cozy chairs inside, while I was bouncing around the ship taking pictures, marveling at the sunset, and pondering the story behind the guy dressed in a (female) nurse’s uniform.Rather spectacular sunset over south island

The three-hour crossing passed quickly and soon we entered Queen’s Charlotte Sound. With all of my mental energy being taken up by the neuroses of jobs, conferences, research, etc, I never actually thought about what New Zealand (and in particular, the South Island) would look like. Just as well, because even my wild imagination would not have done it justice. One of the things I would love best about NZ is that it seemed to encompass all the beautiful places I have seen before. But at first sight, the South Island didn’t remind me of anything, it was just beautiful.

First glimpses

Upon arrival in Picton, we gathered our bags and headed to the backpackers joint, only to find that our room had been given away. The manager was nice but kept talking to herself about the beautiful world and life, and other weird stuff that the Brit and I have since blocked out. However, she does make me happy about my decision to never do drugs. I’m pretty sure she did a lot of them…and for a long time. I’d rather be neurotic than downright nuts. Anyway, she “upgraded” us to a flat that we had to share with another couple. Now I don’t see how sharing a bathroom with random people is an upgrade but we at least had our own room. Before she departed, she returned our key deposit ($20) early. But instead of just handing me the money, she turned her back…and proceeded to dance.

There were hip gyrations involved.

I really didn’t want the $20 anymore.

I don’t know what made me laugh harder, her craziness or the look of pure bewilderment on the Brit’s face.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: the conference in which I learned that the Galapagos Islands control the world’s climate

2011-02-25T09:22:00.002+11:00

Wellington and the Te Papa Museum

The arrival in Wellington didn’t mark the start of the vacation (er, “holiday” if you are British, Australian…or really anyone but American), but rather the start of a 3-day conference on all sorts of weather/climate/ocean nerdiness.

Overall, conferences in Australia/New Zealand are much more laid back than in the US and there is less chance of someone standing up in your talk, yelling “You sit on a throne of lies!” and storming out of the room. But even so, there will always something nerve-wracking about standing up in front of 100 people, spouting off some gibberish about heat budgets for 12 minutes, look at the crowd, and not remember a damn word that came out of my mouth.Wellington coastline...conference dinner was on sheep station at the very end

By day, we scientists prattle on in our specialized scientific jargon that maybe 5 other people can follow and by night, we scientists are still prattling on in our specialized scientific jargon, but thanks to the addition of booze, it starts to make some sense. Most of the world’s greatest scientific papers likely started as sketches on a napkin in some pub.

I spend a lot of time stressing about conferences and the associated scientific talk, small talk, etc and no matter what happens, the world keeps on turning. I’m beginning to wonder if my stress is pointless.

I should probably stop stressing about my stress.

Graham's picture of coast from the sheep station

Anyway, after 3 days of schmoozing and stalking important scientists, the Brit and I slipped out un-noticed (well as un-noticed as a 6ft 4in guy and a loud-mouth American can be) and headed towards the ferry to take us to the South Island.

We. Were. Free.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: just a wee bit of bitching

2011-02-23T09:15:00.001+11:00

Side note: In case people are wondering, yes we were in Christchurch, but left more than 2 days before the earthquake. We are home, safe, and I am amazed by the destruction. I have plenty to say about it but am going to wait until the end of this trip narration.

Anyway…

I actually have very little to bitch about concerning the trip…except for the airline. No travel experience is complete without an airline complaint and as a longtime customer of United, I know what bad service is. But apparently Air New Zealand has been taking notes.

I couldn’t even get out of Australia at first due to the ticket agent’s claims that I had neither proper documentation nor proof of a return ticket. Because I have an Australian visa, I don’t need one for NZ, but she wouldn’t scan my passport, she merely flipped through it, declared that my visa was expired and said I needed to go to another counter to get proper documentation. When she finally stopped playing the solitaire game that must’ve been occupying her screen and looked at my reservation, she declared that my visa was valid. However, she still required proof of a return ticket. I showed her the itinerary from the travel agent (which bears no company logos and I could’ve made on MS Word), she circled my return dates and then issued my boarding pass.

Then I was reprimanded for having both a purse and a backpack as carry-on items.

Compared to her, the customer service reps from United look like geniuses.

The flight itself was fine and I got free tv, but they failed to mention that only certain ticket classes get food. When the food cart came by, I put my table down, the flight attendant just looked at me…and kept walking. Hmmm….awkward. Now it was partially my fault for not understanding the fare classes (I didn’t buy the ticket) and I didn’t really want to pay extra for food, but a) I was starving and b) I looked pretty stupid. The guy next to me took pity and offered me his carrot cake.

After landing in Wellington, I learned that NZ is only slightly less neurotic than Australia with regard to the import of food. As I stood in the customs line, assuring the agent that I had no food, the customs’ dogs came by and practically started licking my backpack. The agent looked at me skeptically and warned that it was my last chance to declare food before receiving a $400 fine*. Ha! The Australian customs agents usually threaten me with a $30k fine.

Anyway, enough bitching. I was there, that’s all that matters.

*If you ever go, they aren’t joking about the food. New Zealand greeted my friend with $400 fine for having an apple in her bag.

A Neurotic’s Guide to New Zealand: The Planning

2011-02-21T20:56:00.002+11:00

The annual conference was in NZ this year and I was not going to waste the opportunity to explore a new country, roam around the mountains, find Aragon and live happily ever after. The Brit was of the same mind (well probably not about Aragorn) so we teamed up to travel the South Island after the conference.

A neurotic would normally plan every second of the trip, but I was too busy being neurotic about other aspects of my life to focus on planning. Furthermore, the Brit spent his January floating around Antarctica on a research cruise (lucky bastard) and had limited contact to help with decision-making. So I just booked a car and some accommodations with flexible cancellation policies and hoped for the best.

The good thing about being stressed about everything else under the sun is that I had no expectations concerning the trip. I just wanted to roam and be surrounded by places that didn’t remind me of work, my future or anything that was accelerating the growth rate of grey hair on my head.

The best part about the trip was that even though I had no expectations, nothing was as I expected. That probably doesn’t make any sense, but you will just have to keep reading to see what I mean.

As always, I kept a travel journal and will post the highlights over the next week or so. Most of my pics will be on Facebook but I will post some here as well.

PS In case some of you are wondering, the Brit survived the trip with me...almost.

back

2011-02-20T17:39:00.002+11:00

Back in Oz which seems exotic to many but I'm spoiled and it seems blah after New Zealand. I have lots to say about the trip and will post my travel journal over the next week or so. But for now, I will just say it was an amazing trip and I loved every minute of it...except when I almost drove off the bridge*.

*I didn't really, but the Brit claims I was trying to kill him.

farewell for now

2011-02-07T14:15:00.002+11:00

I won't be posting much the next two weeks as I am leaving for New Zealand today.

Not that I've been posting much lately anyway.

I've got space for 1500 pictures and a blank notebook ready to record our adventures in the land of Kiwis and hobbits and will hopefully have some entertaining tales when I return.

Stay tuned...

Year in Review: 2010 (yeah seriously it took me forever to get this one done)

2011-01-24T20:39:00.001+11:00

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?
Rock climbing, sailing, playing in a waterfall... not at the same time.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I kept 3 of the 5…sort of:
I spent less time on my computer (mostly because it was taken from me for 3 weeks).
I would like to think I cut wrapping paper somewhat straighter.
I am going to NZ next month but I booked my flights in 2009. Does that count?
I have not found a job but I did apply for many. Hmmm…depressing.
I came nowhere close to learning how to ski.

3. What countries did you visit?
Just the US but in Australia I went to: Canberra, Cairns, the Whitsundays and Tasmania.

4. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
A crazy stalker zoom lens for my camera.

5. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
No specific dates, but the day I played in the waterfall with the Brit and the other Hoosier was pretty cool.

6. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting on the rock wall. The French officemate doesn’t realize it, but it was probably his biggest achievement too.

7. What was your biggest failure?
Not getting a job?

8. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I got whooping cough. Seriously?? The whooping cough wasn’t nearly as bad as the paranoia I felt over whether I’d passed it on to officemate who would pass it on to his 6 month son. Fortunately this didn’t happen.

9. What was the best thing you bought?
My oh-so-pretty Nikon D90 camera.

10. Where did most of your money go?
It was a very expensive camera.

11. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The camera…also visits from my parents, sister and friends

12. What song will always remind you of 2010?
Backfire by 30db

13. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier…and more relaxed. You can’t be a spaz in Australia, they will deport you.
b) thinner or fatter? Thinner…thanks to the hills of Sydney
c) richer or poorer? Richer…this whole real-job thing is kinda cool.

14. What do you wish you’d done more of?
I would’ve liked to gone sailing again…but I think the Canadian learned his lesson (dammit).

15. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Stalk surfers with my camera…I’m starting to get a weird reputation.

16. How did you spend Christmas?
Stalking family members with my camera.

17. Did you fall in love in 2010?
Hmmm….if I did, I wouldn’t be announcing it on my blog.

18. What was your favorite TV program?
Always has been and always will be the Gilmore Girls. I thought getting a TV would introduce to me to a new world of TV shows. All it did was confirm that Australians are obsessed with American TV.

19. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Actually it’s the reverse. Last year at this time, I did un-friend someone from Facebook. The “maturity” of this action is not lost on me, but whatever, it was the right thing to do. Besides, re-friending occurred several months later. How old am I?

20. What was the best book you read?
This Game of Ghosts by Joe Simpson. Others were Touching the Void and Poisonwood Bible. Many thanks to the Australian who has phenomenal literary taste and recommended most of these to me.

21. What was your greatest musical discovery?
The Canadian in the office next door sometimes plays the ukelele. I find it bizarrely relaxing (I really wish he’d brought the damn thing in today).

22. What was your favorite movie of this year?
Didn’t see that many movies this year. I did see HP7 with the Brit at an IMAX theater which was cool.

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
On my 32nd birthday (oh Christ, really?), I guiltlessly did whatever I wanted.

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
These questions are starting to annoy me. I don’t know… I was happy this year, isn’t that enough?

25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
Avoid the Sydney fashion of “Time traveling hooker from the 1980s…”
This is true every year I live here.

26. What kept you sane?
Photography…the best thing is the ability to completely lose myself in the moment. Except for that time I almost stepped off a cliff…

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.
To just be.

battling the beasts

2011-01-20T22:02:00.004+11:00

I was determined to make it to bed early. With sleep-deprivation and a lack of interest in food these days, I usually long for my bed by 10pm but it never seems to work out that way.

Tonight, as I emerged from the shower and walked into the living room, I saw something "large" flying in shadow. Too large to be a moth (unless I was living in some bad Japanese movie), the flipping of the light switch confirmed it to be a cockroach. I never knew they could fly until I moved here. Mother Nature has got one weird sense of humour. As if cockroaches weren't bad enough, evolution had to provide them with wings.

This guy was a kamikazee, flying towards me with no fear. I grabbed the broom and started swatting at him like I was King Kong on the Empire State Building. All those years of baseball paid off because I knocked him down pretty easily. Knowing I'd never be able to shoo him out the open window, I went to the kitchen to get a container (one that would be immediately tossed out), but when I returned, he was gone. Did he realize his future in my apartment was precarious and go out the window on his own? Or is he in some corner, plotting his next attack?

I left the window open and the neighbors watched as I prowled around swatting at imaginary objects on the wall* with my hair in a towel and Biore pore strips stuck to my face. If anyone was wondering why I am single, I think this answers it.

I never found him...and now i have to go to bed.

so much for a decent night's sleep.

*My cat's fascination with imaginary objects on the wall makes alot more sense now.

Highlights from a New Years in which we waited 10 hrs for 12 min of fireworks

2011-01-19T09:20:00.003+11:00

Yeah this seems stupid. If we had chosen a prime spot (in front of the Harbour Bridge), we’d have been waiting for 18 hrs. In the end, you realize the fireworks are the main point of the experience but not as interesting as the experience itself.
- There weather was bipolar. When we arrived it was 90F and my sunburned sis took refuge under my tiny umbrella, by nightfall, it was a breezy and damp 65F and my sis abandoned the umbrella for 3 layers of clothing.

- Our vantage point was an alcohol-free zone but since it didn’t fill up too quickly we were able to sneak out to snag a beer at a nearby pub.

- Our dinner of hotdogs were freakishly red.

- I spent way too much time having to convince my sister that throwing Jelly Bellies at either the bats or the policemen is a bad idea. She is a good role model for her kids.

- There was a couple sitting in front were clearly at the initial stages of their relationship. They couldn’t keep their hands off each other and the guy alternated between spraying cologne and nudging down his pants so his gf could be impressed by his Calvin Klein undies.

- Further in front were another group of 20-somethings who got their beer confiscated about 20 sec after sitting down. They spent the rest of their night fondly clutching their Sprite bottles that I’m guessing were full of something besides Sprite.

- The time between the family fireworks at 9pm and the midnight show dragged on longer than the previous 7hrs with futile attempts to nap or read a book using my sister’s flashlight*.

- The fireworks were pretty awesome. Don’t need to say more than that.

- As soon as the fireworks were over the mad dash to get home began. It was surprisingly easy to get in and out of the city given the number of people. But it was strange to be wandering down empty-smoke filled streets with a thousand other people, feeling the survivors of some apocalyptic event.

- Am I glad I did it? Yes
- Would I do it again? HELL NO

*I’m only mentioning this because I mocked my sister for bringing a flashlight and once I took it, she made me promise to mention in her blog that I was wrong for mocking. So there.

this one is for you, sis

2011-01-12T22:17:00.005+11:00

I often talk about my nieces so I thought I’d give you a chance to get to know them better.

Marah (5 y/o)
She walks with a serious-ness in her step and a sweetness in her eye that suggests dreams of the princes and fairytales that are often the focus of her make-believe world. She approaches life a bit timidly, but her fears are easier to handle when the faithful, if somewhat battered, White Bear is at her side. She is a sensitive soul who sends get-well cards to her great-uncle and is the most concerned (or at least the most vocal) about my prince-less state of existence*. While I was home, she suggested I might find a husband on TV.

Marah was the first baby I felt comfortable holding, not worried that her head would suddenly fall off when placed in my arms. And her yells of “Aunt Laura!!!!!!!!!!” when I visit always make me smile because the excitement in her voice is probably the most honest thing I’ll ever hear.

*I might have to settle down to appease a 5 year old.

Natalie (3 y/o)
Natalie walks with a spring in her step and mischief in her eyes that suggests plots for world domination and cookies. Unlike her sister, she approaches life like a Tasmanian devil, seemingly undeterred the common obstacles presented to a toddler (sleep, authority, large objects, etc). She is a fearless soul, ready to climb the highest slide and disappointed when her bedtime stories are devoid of monsters. In her world, ladybugs are named Lucy, her uncle looks like a Hawaiian girl with flowered flipflops, and will likely fall asleep pointing at a cookie jar*.

As I have been overseas for most of Natalie’s life, I do not know her as well as her sister and there is a bit of skepticism in her attitude towards me that I can appreciate. However, she has no problem with me when I’m sneaking her cookie dough.

*I realize only a few will get this but believe me, it applies.

mean

2011-01-07T21:53:00.001+11:00

So so behind on the blog…I know.

Rather than giving the long rundown on my trip to the US, I will just say it was a fun snowy, friend-and-family-filled time and leave you with this little anecdote that proves what a mean aunt I am.

One evening, I was helping my sister and her girls make Christmas cookies. A messy process, and while my sister was mixing the dry ingredients (flour, baking soda, salt), some inevitably landed on the table. My dear nieces, thinking any ingredient in cookie dough must also taste like cookie, began eating the flour. They weren’t really listening to our commands to stop so I told them that if they keep eating it, a pizza will grow in their stomach.

Marah became very worried and asked for a glass of water to wash away the pizza-forming ingredients.

Natalie stuck out her tummy, patted it, and said “mmmm pizza….”

the sign of a true sweetheart

2010-12-15T12:00:00.000+11:00

Before I left Sydney, I was hanging out with my friend’s two kids, aged 6 and 3. The 6 y/o girl told me there was no Santa Claus but then asked me if I thought there was. Not being their parent, the mention of Santa Claus is an evil double-edged sword: if I say no, it is possible I have entered a trap sprung by a child trying to discover the truth and thereby ruining the illusion, but if I yes, I look crazy if the child has already been told the truth. In the end, I always err on the side of caution and am a “believer” when kids ask. So I told the 6 y/o that I did believe in him. She sort of looked me like I had lobsters crawling out of my ears and dropped the subject.
Her mom sent me an email today, recounting the following conversation with her daughter:

6 y/o: "Most kids in my class still believe in Santa Claus. When they talk about it, I just listen because I do not want to spoil it for them. Some adults believe in Santa Claus too!"
Mom: "??? really"
6 y/o: "Yes! Laura!"
Mom: "?"
6 y/o: "Yes, it is true. I asked her: do you believe in Santa Claus? and she said yes. So I did not quite know what to say. I did not tell her that she is mistaken, maybe it is important for her? I did not want to make her sad..."

So I’ve no doubt that the 6 y/o thinks I’m slightly unhinged (true enough) but I appreciate that she is considerate enough of my feelings not to hurt them.

travel

2010-12-13T07:19:00.001+11:00

As always, trans-pacific travel necessitates a blog post on the random happenings. It was pretty uneventful but there is always something to comment on.

- The trip started on a sketchy note when an elderly man, who was painting an apartment in my building, tried to help me with my luggage and nearly fell over when trying to lift it. Thankfully my ride had arrived and my friend quickly got the suitcase before we had to make a side trip to the hospital.

- I actually arrived in Denver before I left Sydney. No matter how much I travel, the concept of the 40hr day always amuses me, but that is probably due to the jetlag.

- I never sleep heading to the US due to the time changes but this time I took some Advil PM…washed down with white wine. Moral of the story: drugs and booze can be useful…I slept off and on for about 8hrs.

- At LAX I had to go through one of the “evil” full body scanners. You step into the scanner and face one wall that has a schematic demonstrating the proper stance, complete with hand-drawn smiley faces and big ears.

- I swear it took longer to board a 757 than a 747 because people kept bitching about places to put their luggage and then put up a fight when the flight attendants said the luggage would have to be checked. If the bins are full, I have no idea where these people thought the luggage should go. On their laps?

no blog is complete without the discussion of livestock

2010-12-09T06:59:00.003+11:00

I have lived in two states in which agriculture is a key contribution to the economy but it wasn’t until I moved to a major metropolitan area that livestock was worth mentioning in this blog. The problem comes in the form of a rooster…need I say more?

The neighbor’s chickens have always sort of amused me. I used to think I was crazy to think I could hear chickens in the vicinity (I mean, it's Sydney not southern Indiana) but an overgrowth of foliage prevented me from actually seeing them in the neighboring yard. Then the chickens were murdered one night and the livestock massacre became the talk of the neighborhood for a few days*. Several months went by and the chickens were replaced. During their absence, the foliage was removed and I now have a clear view of their happenings and they keep me entertained during those rare moments when I am bored.

At first the rooster was a silent soul, blending in with the rest of the poultry menagerie in the neighbors yards…probably because he was too young at the time to do much damage. And then one morning, lying in the half awake/half asleep dreamlike-doze, I heard it. At first I couldn’t figure out what it was, but then the light clicked on in my brain. I started cursing but after realizing the futility of it, I did what you’d expect…I opened the windows and took some pictures.

Highlights:
- One morning I learned that there are two roosters…and they were competing for the worst prepubescent alarm clock award…What the heck?? Are they gremlins? Did someone throw water on them? If so, then the abundance of rain this year does not bode well for my sleep.

-Another morning I looked out the window to find the rooster fulfilling his destiny while sitting on top of a stepladder while the entranced chickens surrounded him from below and gazed up…it was very Animal Farm. And I have now named the rooster Snowball.

-This past Friday, the rooster must have been jetlagged as he started his wake-up call at 1am. And yes, I did open my window to start yelling “shut up, you stupid rooster!”

Of late the roosters have been quiet. I don’t know what this means…did he lose his voice, has he been silenced? Livestock crime seems to be running rampant in my neck of the woods.

* It was quite morbid, but at the same time, I was relieved to know I hadn't imagined the chickens.

rather pathetic that it took me over a week to write about my non-thanksgiving

2010-12-03T21:49:00.005+11:00

These pictures don’t have much to do with the subject but I thought I needed to post some anyway.

In years past I have always managed to celebrate Thanksgiving in some form or another: trip to Brisbane, tickets to Wicked, etc, but turkey day was kind of pathetic this year. I still got the turkey feast: the Hoosier hosted her annual Pan-American Thanksgiving Dinner a month ago to avoid the near heat stroke caused from trying to use an oven in 40C heat in November*. But I spent the actual Turkey Day glued to my computer, working and feasting on Doritos and a Twix Bar. The Dirtbag had the audacity to skype chat me that evening but is sadly getting used to my outbursts so my bitchiness had little effect on him. The Australian had the misfortune to walk past my office while I was having an existential breakdown over the plausibility of negative sea ice concentrations. He talked me down from the ledge and then ran away at the first possible moment.

Yeah…don’t feel too bad for me. The weekend was a vast improvement, full of ballet recitals and ocean swims in 16C. Raviolis were made, naps were napped and photos were snapped.

*Ironically, we have yet to get above 30C this year.

reasons for excitement

2010-11-21T21:49:00.002+11:00

It all started with my visa was approval: I’ve mellowed out a lot over the past two years but dealing with the immigration office tends to accelerate the growth of gray hair on my head. As part of my contract extension, I had to renew my visa, which got surprisingly complicated. But, alas, all is well and I am allowed to be in the country. Until…

December, when I go home for Xmas. No matter how long I live here, Christmas is not the same. While I find people singing “White Christmas” on the beach to be delightfully ironic, I also find half-naked Santas on surfboards to be disturbingly creepy. So I will be home for Xmas but…

This will be my first year spending New Year’s in Australia, and my sister will be here to celebrate. I believe there is some sort of betting pool as to who will kill who first. Assuming I survive, I won’t be back in Sydney for too long because…

I am going to New Zealand in February: Finally! This has been on my list for some time and I look forward to exploring. The world is a big place and I’ve not seen that much of it.

For an exciting post, it's actually kind of boring. I need to post more about impromptu full moon parties or the rooster alarm clock convention (these topics may or may not be related)...

weekend antics

2010-11-09T21:02:00.001+11:00

If you can believe it, I did not take a SINGLE picture this weekend. It wasn’t a picture-taking weekend I guess. I felt alittle empty and confused but still managed to have a lovely weekend.

Friday began with no plans for the evening and evolved into dinner with the other Hoosier which further evolved into Thai food with Germans, Canadians and Brazilians…and ended with beer, Brits and Hoosiers. A free-for-all with origami frogs.

Saturday I vowed to work…and lived up to this vow so well that I didn’t get out of my pajamas until 4:30pm and that was only because I was talked into going out for dinner. It was a nice evening filled with random discussions about my colour preferences for the game Risk* and the Brit’s education, which included rifles being shot in gym and birds of prey swooping over students who were made to lie on the floor.

I went to school in the wrong country.

Sunday, my vow to work was broken after a few text messages enticing me to go play by the sea. Unlike the previous days, the weather was sparkling so I hung out with the German and her German/Canadian family. I think sometimes people worry that their kids are bugging me, but there is something refreshingly honest about a child WANTING to hang out with you. No false pretenses…besides those kids are far more mature than I. However, the 5 y/o did tattle-tell on me…even worse she did it in a foreign language so who knows what her charges against me were.

*This discussion was prompted by my looking at the radar network for Australia on an iPhone, but how my mind went from Radars to Risk is anyone’s guess…

shizotic

2010-11-01T21:31:00.001+11:00

Anyone who has talked to me recently knows that I’m having trouble putting together two coherent sentences, so entire coherent blog post seems unlikely. Some random thoughts:

- I am happy to report that I spent Halloween entirely eye-patch free. I did however, make a complete and utter fool of myself. I will leave the “whats” and “whys” to be answered by your imagination.
- I went to a friend’s Halloween party given for her kids. I was the only adult without a child. Basically my costume was to be that creepy person without kids at a kids’ party.
- This year we decided to do Thanksgiving Canuck-style and celebrate it BEFORE Halloween, partially because it was ridiculously hot last year. But once again, Mother Nature had the last laugh, making it cold and rainy. Sort of felt like a real Thanksgiving though.
- I had three coffees today…
- Thanks to the humidity, if my hair gets any bigger, it will need its own postcode.
- It’s 930pm and I’m contemplating an early night.

Lament on a Friday afternoon

2010-10-22T23:55:00.002+11:00

There are like 3 people left in the office on this gloriously beautiful Friday afternoon. Sadly, I am one of them.

The Brit, who left early to go play by the sea, just called me to announce a whale sighting off the coast. He attempted to convince me to abandon my noble attempts at productivity, but unless I literally jumped on the trunk of car heading to the beach, there is no way I’d make it in time.

Then he called again to detail the actions of the whales.

I called him a punk.

I did my taxes today, which is always a bit nerve-wracking because I’m never quite sure if I’m doing it right. I always get a ridiculously large refund. Feeling it was my duty as the daughter of a former IRS employee, I helped another with his taxes. I told him he would likely get a huge refund. In the end, he did not. This does not bode well for a future with H&R Block...

Have you noticed that I stopped marking time on the blog? I made it two years, the rest is just bonus time.

tasmania

2010-10-21T23:34:00.002+11:00

If I were ever going to move to Australia permanently, it would be to Tasmania. I didn't even see that much of the island and I'm already planning another trip back. It's unlike any other place I've seen in Australia. Green, hilly, with an English seaside* feel to it.The weather was kind of cold and cruddy but it's nice to have cold weather in October.

The conference itself was fine. I'm getting to the point where I don't get too nervous about public speaking. The chair of my session was a very nice elderly gentleman who had booming voice. When he announced I had 5 min remaining, I started giggling...it sounded like God was speaking to me...and telling me to shut up.

*Of course I've never been to England so what do I know.

two years

2010-10-12T13:49:00.001+11:00

I made it.

When I got on the plane two years ago, I never thought I’d last. I was crying, my dad was crying, even the security personnel looked teary-eyed.

Two years seemed so long, everything so uncertain and just…scary.

But here I am…with an extended contract. I guess it’s not so bad here after all.

I commemorated my anniversary by chaperoning the semi-annual field trip. Always an interesting experience, this year’s highlight involved feral cats on a revetment wall and an impromptu autopsy of a turtle.

For some reason, field trip day is not complete unless it ends with bowling and drinking vodka with the Hoosiers. I tend to be a bit self-conscious when it comes to bowling, but no one in this group can claim mastery over the “sport”. The Canadian kicked butt with 4 strikes in a row, but reverse-redeemed himself with two gutterballs in an attempt to bowl lefthanded. The Brit lamented over his lack of skill until he got a strike at which point the lamenting turned into plotting bowling supremacy over the group. I suck, I know suck and I am at peace with it. I came in last both times and my one spare was likely the result of divine intervention.

After bowling, several of us headed to the beach. I love the ocean at night. There is a strange allure to the sea, fading into the never-ending abyss of night.

The next morning, wide awake at 5am*, I headed back to the beach. I haven’t taken any pictures in a week and it hurts my soul. The sunrise fixed that. The predawn beach atmosphere is a fascinating mix of lifestyles. The hardcore runners are up early, getting a fresh start to the day while the drunks are up late, ending their long night with a few inappropriate comments directed toward me.

*Yes, I did go home and go to sleep. The insomnia was just a coincidence.

Day 730: things to do on a rainy day

2010-10-07T22:26:00.000+11:00

Last year, it rained on Labour Day weekend. This year, it rained on Labour Day weekend. Figures… Still there are ways to keep oneself occupied.

Your taxes: well, in theory, in reality, I never progressed beyond thinking about it.

Read: Favorite rainy day activity. Good book + Miles Davis = awesome

Have a skype conversation with a drunk person: you know who are. Thanks for the amusement.

Take pictures: Screw the rain, the Brazilian, the Brit and I braved the crappy weather to battle for photographic supremacy. We were ridiculously geeked out about the whole thing, taking pictures of the same rock for an hour. Non-photo nerds (i.e., normal people) would’ve lost their patience and tossed us in the water. But it was awesome to be out there with people who share my obsession. I posted some pics on Facebook. One day I’ll post on here again.

Go to a museum: Don’t go to a science and industry museum with a group of scientists. It took us 3hrs to get through 1 floor.

Sit on the steps of Coogee Beach at 5pm on Monday as the sun finally makes an appearance: Murphy, you’re a ... well, you know what I mean.

Day 724: anecdotes

2010-10-02T17:50:00.002+10:00

Ok I’m back…I swear…or at least until I start getting ready for the conference in Tasmania (insert Tasmanian Devil joke here).

Little anecdotes from the past few weeks:

- I went to a Tim McGraw concert…in Australia. I find this to be ironic. But nearly getting into a fight with some bloke who was about 6 times my size made it feel like a true country-music experience. He even said “bullshit” with a nice little twang.

- Apparently I am a feminist. Going out to dinner with a guy friend, he tried to pull out a chair for me, which I walked past on the way to my pulling out my own chair. He just shook his head and we spent the next 20 min discussing this small oversight on my part. It wasn’t that I didn’t want the seat, I just wasn’t paying attention. I mean, how many guys do YOU know that would do that. Anyway, I asked him if he thought I was too independent and his emphatic “yes” was punctuated with laughter. I guess it’s true to an extent, but you can’t move to a foreign country on your own without acquiring a little bit of independence.

- My photo-stalking has been a bit slow thanks to the work but I’ve thrown some pics up on facebook. Today I had alittle “excursion” but more on that later. But as a preview, insults about composition and colour contrast were hurled* about and I was accused of being competitive. Who, me?

- I taught my very first “real” lecture this week. I think it went pretty well. No one threw anything but as the Dirtbag pointed out, it was probably because they were asleep.

Alright that’s it for now. I’ll post again soon I promise. It’s raining this weekend so that usually acts a nice catalyst for a blog post.

*All in good (nerdy) fun of course :)

Day 720: I suck

2010-09-28T19:17:00.001+10:00

I keep saying that I'm going to post more regularly but as it turns out, I "sit on a throne of lies" (name that movie quote!). I hope to post something more substantial soon, but if not, all is well here, just busy. Work + class + social life = exhausted me.

Day 711: practice

2010-09-19T23:20:00.006+10:00

I’m writing this as I sit in a friend’s house, watching over their sleeping kids as their mum is in Europe and their dad is playing hockey. Night #2 for hockey babysitting and I can't imagine how anyone is playing at 1130pm. Are penalties invoked for sleeping on the ice?

I digress...

I’ve had my camera one week and have already taken over 800 pics. Yeah, I’m not obsessed or anything. Keep in mind, I’ve only kept about 20. I’m getting a reputation. People I barely know ask me “have you stalked any surfers lately?” Yes, but they look like blurry masses of goo thanks to my inarticulate attempts at manual focus. It’s definitely a learning process, but I love every minute of it.

This weekend was a perfect example: The swell was pumping, whales were frolicking, but in the end I only kept one photo from the 200 hundred I took on Friday. The rest just sucked: either too boring, too dark, too light, too something…it’s not a bad thing. I’m just learning.

Alittle blurry but one of my favs.

Undeterred by the previous day’s failures, I was out the door by 745am on Saturday. Only runners and surfers are out that early on a Sat morning so it wasn’t surprising that I ran into the Canadian in search of some waves. He kindly gave me a ride to a nearby beach, but opted against surfing since the waves were already heavily dotted with surfers. So we sat on the beach, he stared longingly at the surf and cursed the crowds that I happily stalked. Afterward, he introduced me to the best coffee I’ve had since I started paying homage to Juan Valdez.

After breakfast, the Canadian ditched me in search of the perfectly uncrowded wave and I headed to the rocks, intending to nap by the sea. Instead I was mesmerized by the dolphins and surfers in unusual places. My Hoosier friends joined me and we reveled in the beauty of our home. The pictures were better, but...

If you look closely (click on the pic), you can see some surfers. There are never waves here so they were looking for their golden opportunity.

The surfers disappeared quite quickly. They might've gotten rides with the dolphins (click for bigger pic).

The rest of the day was photo free. My dear Australian* friend kindly helped me with some dress alternations and I repaid her by running out door, realizing I was late for babysitting and going to make 3 Canadians miss their hockey game (NEVER stand in the way of Canadians and their hockey). I barely made it, but the guys got there, the game was won, and the kids were happily entertained in their absence.

I didn't take any photos today but I did ask the advice of Fe, the other photo fanatic. He looked at my photos, bluntly told me what’s wrong, and advised me to keep one photograph from the weekend. I kept more than that. They’re not perfect but they do document an absolutely lovely weekend.

*Ironically, I only have about 2 Australian friends.

Day 707: miracles DO happen

2010-09-14T23:21:00.001+10:00

The miracle being that I’m actually updating the blog…

Hopefully the blog will be updated more regularly. If for no other reason than I need a place to showcase photos from my new camera. Yep that’s right, I finally bought a new camera. Originally I planned to wait, but as my passion for photography grows so does my frustration with the limitations of my little point-and-click. Besides you can’t be a serious stalker without a zoom lens.

Once I made the decision to buy a camera, I proceeded with a determination not seen since Ralphie plotted for his Red Ryder. Spreadsheets were made, product reviews were scrutinized, and photography-inclined friends were “consulted”*.

In the end, I walked out of the camera store with a Nikon D90. It’s quite the upgrade from my old camera and more than I can handle at this point, but I’d rather have something that I can spend years learning with than buy a camera, get bored after a year, buy a newer one, etc etc. Besides, this one made me drool.

Ok, I’m done rationalizing. One of these days I’ll post some pics…when I figure out how to turn on the camera.

* I think interrogated is probably a more appropriate word here. Especially considering I had no qualms harassing the Dirtbag mere hours before he ran a 100-mile race.

Day 700: the one with all the canadians

2010-09-07T07:19:00.002+10:00

I am finally better. Last week was rough and the closest I’ve come to an actual mental meltdown in quite some time. Being sick and not being able to rest sucks. Sorry I’ve not been posting, I just couldn’t quite muster the energy.

Although I’ve been sick, I refuse to sit at home on the weekends because I will go mad (I need cable). So I’ve been harassing some Hoosiers (they can relate to my apprehension of foreign medicine and think Breaking Away is a cool movie) as well my co-worker and her German/Canadian family. My co-worker is one of those people who has been everywhere, done everything, and begins her stories* with “Once, when I was in Africa, I was on this donkey for three days…” These people have been so nice to me while I’ve been sick, but I didn’t want to subject them to another weekend of me and me-ness. But my need to rest battled with my need to go out and feel like a human again.

The Canadian (not to be confused with the German/Canadians mentioned above) provided an excellent opportunity by inviting to me to a ‘concert’ with him and his friend the Other Canadian. Initially, I sensed that the Canadian was having “inviter’s remorse” and wasn’t thrilled with my presence as it seemed to be ruining “guys night” but dammit I put on makeup and was going out anyway. They took it in stride and treated me as “one of the guys”, which I always find to be an enlightening experience but I’ll save the analysis for another day.

The concert was really a fundraiser to promote…actually I don’t know because the music was louder than the explanation for the music. I hope it was a good cause. Anyway the music was fun, the conversation “intriguing”, and there were women dressed in Vegas-esque costumes. I have no idea why the concert required these scantily-clad women but the guys didn’t seem to mind…

Afterward, the boys followed me home in search of the ibuprofen that would undoubtedly become part of their morning repast. One Canadian sat on my couch and marveled at my extensive Gilmore Girls DVD collection while the other prowled around my place searching for who-knows-what, eating my tomatoes and discovering my flatiron. Being a guy, he was mystified by this styling contraption, insisting on straightening a few tendrils of my hair. In hindsight, letting a drunk boy come anywhere near my head with a hot piece of styling equipment was pretty damn stupid, but I emerged unscathed.

I spent the next afternoon at the beach…on a rock…asleep.

*Most of my stories start with “this one time, I was doing counted cross-stitch…” Yeah, it’s just not the same.

Day 693

2010-08-31T13:36:00.002+10:00

I am neglecting this blog and will probably continue to do so for awhile. Things are a bit overwhelming right now and even I am having a hard time finding amusement in the bizarre events of late. I sound rather melodramatic and don't mean to be. It just is.

But hey, at least I added a pretty picture.

Day 688: fuzzyhead

2010-08-26T22:44:00.004+10:00

My need for mind-numbing constant activity has been beaten down by a nasty cold and cough that insists on persisting. I just took some nighttime cold medicine so this blog post could get interesting real soon.

I find taking medication in a foreign country to be vaguely unsettling. Given all the things I’ve consumed in the US, I should be able to ingest rusty nails with little problem. But the medicines here has mystery names that mean nothing to me. When I asked for cold medicine, the chemist went to his stash behind the counter, asked me for the secret handshake and then handed me a box-o-drugs with odd words on it. At that point, I felt so cruddy I would've taken anything. Trial and error is more acceptable when you're fuzzyheaded and incapable of logic.

Meh, whatever it is seems to be working. I’m not coughing, but my legs are numb and I can’t stop watching Simon’s Cat videos…

I was going to rant about how rough my life is but typing is suddenly very hard.

Dad, can you make me a hot toddy?

Day 684: news of the week

2010-08-22T17:52:00.003+10:00

So originally, I was writing a little bit each day of the week and was going to post that. But it was so boring that I fell asleep just re-reading it. So here is a much shorter version:

Quote of the Week: “It’s like he’s a troll on the bridge and if I don’t have the correct password, he’ll eat my baby”.

Email of the Week (from a student): "Here is my lab assignment. I am going to drink."

Complaint of the Week: Only one??? Shocking I know…anyway, I have a cold. I never have colds, which is a good thing because I usually whine like I’m dying…in other words, I act like a male.

Freakout of the Week: oh let’s not even go there. Someone looks at me funny and I freak out. Besides, a few of you have already heard the freakout of the week. The rest of you are just going to wonder…

Musical discovery of the Week: The Canadian in the office next door brought in his ukulele as a stress-reliever. At first I thought I was going crazy, hearing music after I had removed my headphones, but then I had a strange urge to go to Hawaii. Sure enough, my officemate was hearing it too. At first I was like “wtf”, but given that our office is a cornucopia of strange behaviors, its par for the course. It was relaxing too. He even takes requests.

Physical Activity of the Week: Pilates? I didn’t do anything else, I spent the first part of the week working non-stop to prepare for class on Wednesday and spent the second part of the week getting sick.

New discovery of the week: The neighbors have pet chickens again. Hopefully no one decapitates them this time.

Picture of the Week: I haven’t taken any since last Sunday, but I like this one.

Day 674: you are what you like

2010-08-12T17:37:00.003+10:00

According to Rob Gordon, “ …what really matters is what you like, not what you are like... Books, records, films - these things matter. Call me shallow but it's the fuckin' truth…” Interesting point. So instead of doing one of those stupid “getting to know you” lists, I’ll just list the songs in my latest iTunes playlist*.

1. “Hummer” and “Age of Innocence” - Smashing Pumpkins. One of my all-time favorite groups. Saw them in concert during my freshman year. 11th row seats seem great until you realize everyone in the first 10 rows is taller than you…

2. “My Own Worst Enemy” - Lit. I ALWAYS headbang the first few verses…a good source of amusement (or concern) for those around me.

3. “Fields of Gold” - Sting: Classic

4. “Reuben and Cherise” - Yonder Mountain String Band: While traditionally a bluegrass-esque band, they’ve performed this Jerry Garcia Band tune several times. I much prefer this version.

5. “Streamside” and “Broken Arrow” - The Album Leaf: excellent recommendation by Rachel. I listened to this group quite often while writing my dissertation in coffee shops.

6. “Summer Nights” - Van Halen and “Poles Apart” - Pink Floyd: How is God’s name did these get lumped together? The summer I turned 16, I worked at my cousins’ resort in northern Wisconsin. Their daughter (my age) liked Pink Floyd, I liked Van Halen. We compromised. Can’t hear these songs without thinking of that summer.

7. “Learning to Fly” - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers: Hands down, my favorite song. Has been for over 10 years. I suspect it has something to do with drugs, but I like to infer a different meaning.

8. “Still in Love with You” - Trampled by Turtles: This alt-bluegrass band was recommended by The Dirtbag. He and I are polar opposites in most respects, but, damn, that boy has yet to recommend a band I didn’t like.

9. “The Adventure” - Angels and Airwaves: Best first line of a song: “I wanna have the same last dream again, the one where I wake up and I'm alive.”

10. “Mona Lisa” - Nat King Cole: Doesn’t really fit in this playlist, but my iTunes library is full of songs from this genre. I like this one in particular because my grandfather always sang it to me.

11. “Clawhammer Medley” - Steve Martin: I bet you didn’t know he played the banjo.

12. “Safety Dance” - Glee Cast: I should be ashamed of this, but, whatever, it’s fun.

Ok, if I commented on EVERY song, this post would go on forever.
13. “What Sarah Said” - Death Cab for Cutie.
14. “Broken” - Norah Jones
15. “For the Widows in Paradise” - Sufjan Stevens
16. “Warning Sign” - Coldplay
17. “Just Say Yes” - Snow Patrol
18. “Aurora” - Foo Fighters
19. “Reflecting Light” - Sam Phillips
20. “Can’t Take it In/First Train Home” - Imogen Heap
21. “Sense” - Pete Yorn
22. “Crazy Game of Poker”-OAR
23. “Backfire”- 30db

*Not entirely representative of my tastes, but kind of my mood of the day: If I’m in one of “those” moods, Tori Amos is my girl. If it’s raining, jazz and/or classical tend to dominate the playlist. Today I drank too much coffee and therefore my mood was a bit schizo...

Day 669: conquerors and contortionists

2010-08-07T21:47:00.002+10:00

For 10 years people have been trying to coax me to go climbing and for 10 years I’ve remained unconvinced, mostly because of the archetypal fears that Joe Simpson so eloquently described. But sometimes, I am just tried of being afraid. So…long story short, last weekend The Officemate did the unimaginable and convinced me to go to the indoor climbing gym with him, his wife, and 4 month old son Jack.

I picked a good person to go with. He was understanding but adamant, cutting off all protests, pointing at the wall and demanding that I “go”. Realizing that contemplation was my enemy, I walked to the wall, put my foot on the first notch and away I went. I stopped after a few metres and hung on the rope so I would learn to trust it, but then I was back at it. I didn’t have a goal in mind. I didn’t have anything in mind other than a fierce concentration on where my hands and feet should go next.

It wasn’t graceful, I used every notch available and even contemplated using the head of the guy climbing next to me, but I did it. I got almost to the top on the first climb and “summitted” on the second climb. For most people, it’s not a big deal. For me, it is. Something that I never thought I would/could actually do. I can’t describe it so I won’t even try.

I did the belay-thing several times but I didn’t climb again; I needed to come away from that first trip with a positive experience. At some point I will fall and it will be interesting to see how I react. But for the rest of the morning, I was content to carry Jack and study those around me, climbing up walls with an athleticism that hinted of gymnastics and ballet. The climbers fascinated Jack with their spider-like grace and Jack fascinated the climbers with his contortionist ability to stick both feet in his mouth.

I left pretty exhausted, more mentally than physically although my arms/hands were quite sore. Tip: don’t go out for yum cha* the day after your first climbing experience. Chopsticks and cramped hands don’t mix well.

So what do I think of it? It still scares me. It is ironic that I didn’t think to be scared while actually climbing, but the thought of it now terrifies me. But it also fascinates me. It is such an analytical process, trying to figure how tackle the wall. I can only imagine what the great outdoors are like. It’s no wonder so many scientists seem to like it.

And yes, I’m going again. Tomorrow actually.

*If you've never had yum cha before, I’m pretty it is Chinese for “free-for-all” which includes rude wait-staff, a willingness to try food with only its appearance as a description, and a cheque with smiley-face stamps that somehow correspond to the price. Fascinating.

Day 66...oh that's creepy

2010-08-04T21:29:00.001+10:00

I am bloody knackered.

…and British?

In my quest for near constant mind-numbing activity, I am wearing myself out. Not in a bad way. Just in a tiring way. But on the bright side, I’ve done lots of interesting things. I just don’t have time to talk about them. But the biggest one for me is that I went climbing. It wasn’t so much that I went climbing, it’s that I did something that absolutely terrifies me. Fear is such a funny emotion. If I had time, I would elaborate, but since I don’t, I will leave you some interesting thoughts from Joe Simpson, famed mountaineer/author. He is famously known for his “Touching the Void” experience, but in his book “This Game of Ghosts”, he talks a lot about the nature of fear, and I thought a lot of it applied to me. So here you go... next time I promise to explain why this applies:

I suppose it is only the belief of being in control that keeps us all on an even keel. The moment we suspect that we are losing control is the moment when fear edges into the fragile balance of our sanity. Death by drowning, burning or falling are archetypal fears that we all recognize, though few alive know of them from experience. We shudder at the imagination of pain before ending in the unknown and wrongly think of them as our worst fear. The violent and numbing reality of crashing a car or plunging down a mountainside is in fact so brutal that there is no time for fear. More often than not, it is an experience of deep calm resignation, an utter helplessness so profound that knowing we can do nothing leaves us emotionally empty. *

Uncontrolled fear is a corrosive fear, something that gnaws away at the fabric of your mind, screws you up to a frightful aching state of anxiety, and leaves you with nothing good. “Will I win or lose? Where will I get the money for the mortgage payments? Are my children safe? Do people like me? Am I a failure, Will I appear foolish or boring? Am I good enough, strong enough, brave enough? Am I making a serious mistake?” There is nothing but sickness in this sort of fear; sickness of the mind which produces no answers to your questions and leave you in an agonizing limbo. At least there is the fight and flee surge of adrenalin in the archetypal fears and the sense of achievement and confidence that comes with confronting the beast.

If you choose to stand under a vast icy mountain wall and make that committing step up, then you have the comfort of choosing your fear. It is something you go to willingly. Embracing the near future and all that it will throw at you with open arms and a clear mind, confident that you will succeed, you will control it. There is no control over parental anxiety, or the stressed businessman’s self-doubts, or the world of the lonely and the heartsick. Once indulged, imagined fears of this kind hold us prisoner. They are the penalty of thinking, the penance of life.

*If anyone would know about this, it would be Joe Simpson. This guy should’ve died about 20 different times.

Day 661: random thoughts

2010-07-30T13:52:00.001+10:00

It’s one of those insane weeks where you barely have time to breathe much less get everything done (good God I even turned off Facebook one day). However, I’d like to think that breathing is an important aspect of keeping one’s sanity. So while I edit matlab manuals, revise a journal manuscript, answer 30 student emails, write a new journal article and 2 conference abstracts, attempt to have a social life, and bring about world peace, I will also blog some random things running through my mind these days:

While I’m ashamed to admit that I even have an opinion on the whole Twilight phenomena, I just have to say: I am pro Jacob. Edward is a wuss.

The other day my officemate asked how I was and I responded with the “fake smile”. Those of you who know me well have seen this look. It kind of freaked him out.

However, the “fake smile” didn’t deter him from persuading me to go climbing this weekend. If you don’t hear from me by Monday, then I’m still clinging to the top of a climbing wall, waiting for the firemen to come and coax me down.

The other day I was given a pamphlet about safety in NSW. It had the typical tips, which all boil down to: don’t attract attention to yourself. But then it suggests that if you are riding the trains by yourself after dark, “sit next to someone and smile”. Um…I don’t even smile and manage to attract some really creepy guys. These suggested actions would probably result in who-knows-what.

My students this year seem to be little geniuses. I won’t talk too much about them on the blog because it doesn’t seem to be appropriate, but I will say that the highlight thus far has been watching the girls hit on my co-worker.

In addition to running, pilates, and zumba, I’ve started up the spinning classes again. I think I may be trying to kill myself.

The work week is over in ~4 hrs. As God is my witness, I’m going to sleep in on Sunday.

Day 657: conversations on a cliff

2010-07-26T21:29:00.018+10:00

I was supposed to go to work Sunday. Instead…

As I was indulging in some cliff reading, I was approached by a guy looking for some company. Now I’m usually pretty oblivious to guys hitting on me, but I’d have to be an idiot to not see this. After a few introductory comments about the weather, he wanted to know if I was married. Hoping to deter him, I told him I was in a relationship*. He was undaunted by this hindrance and proceeded to give me a list of his “attributes” (don’t ask, they were weird). He definitely had a creepy vibe, but I couldn’t easily get away from him since he was blocking the path off the rocks and behind me was a 100ft drop into the sea. With morbid new stories about guys pushing their girlfriends off cliffs dancing through my head, I politely conversed with him but offered only vague details. He was ecstatic to learn that I hailed from the US, commenting that he wanted to go to Vegas and New York City. Now I’ve heard that plenty of times before, but the remainder of the conversation was unique:

Guy: Yeah, I really want to go to Queens so I can meet a nice woman and have lots of sex.
Me: In Queens? (WTH, is Queens the sexpot capital of the US?)
Guy: Yep
Me: Um… good luck with that.
Guy: Hey you want to go to the movies this afternoon?
My inner voice: Dude, I’ve never even visited Queens, you’re wasting your time.
My outer voice: Actually I’m meeting some friends in a half hour.

He must’ve finally accepted that his fantasies about American women were going to stay just that because he said his goodbyes and left me to contemplate how I seem to attract the creepiest of guys (this is not the first time this has happened). I then turned my attention to ocean where several whales were frolicking about on their way to the northern tropical waters. I should feel lucky, I was only harassed by one guy, those poor whales were being stalked by ~5 boats.

Despite the creepy dudes crawling around the cliffs, I decided to stay by the sea and practice my moonscape photography. It was a beautiful evening, but sort of eerie with the storm clouds off in the distance (creepy guys didn’t help). As I waited for the light to change, I munched on Reese’s Pieces, half expecting ET to walk up, take a few and then have a thoughtful discussion over the merits of Drew Barrymore’s career once ET phoned home. It was just that sort of evening. When I commenced my moon stalking, I got so lost in my task that an unexpected bright flash of light prompted the question “what idiot is using flash for moon pics”…the sharp crash of thunder prompted the answer: “Mother Nature”. Time to go home.

As I made my way back, I saw some people twirling flaming torches on the beach under the fading moonlight.

This place is never boring.

*At times like these, it is always useful to have a boyfriend, a serious boyfriend, we’re practically married so please go away…

Day 652: surfer stalking

2010-07-21T11:04:00.008+10:00

So the combination of my photography obsession with my ongoing quest for mind-numbing-stay-busy-so-I-won’t-feel-like-#$&^# activities led me to the local surfer beach at 7am on a Saturday morning. I picked a good day for it. The sun was out, the surf was pumping, and the boys* were ripping it up. Armed with my camera, a cup of coffee and some fierce determination, I set out to capture the “perfect” shot of the surfers doin’ their thing.

Perhaps I should feel bad about stalking random people in the name of art? I don’t think the surfers cared too much, several walked by, looked at me knowingly and grinned. I imagine some love the attention. I was once photographing a kite surfer on the Sunshine Coast and when he realized what I was doing, he moved closer, waved and proceeded to show me his best “moves”.

Anyway, the thing I love about photography is that I totally immerse myself in it, stop paying attention to my thoughts, surroundings, everything else but studying the motion of the water, the surfers, determining the best light, and praying that I’m actually getting good shots (and not just being a creepy stalker).

After 2 hrs, I finally ran out of batteries, realized I’d sacrificed my coffee to Poseidon and needed to head back. That evening, after plying my friends with wine and homemade ravioli, I showed off the results of my morning. And my darling friends, with their charming bluntness, told me which were good and bad. In the end, of 100 photos I took, these are the 3 I kept. I still need alot of practice (they're still kind of "noisy"), but I am pretty damn proud of them.

*I’ve noticed that surfers don’t just walk to the water, many of them run to it. I don’t get why. Is it enthusiasm, a fear that surf will instantaneously disappear, or is it a promo for Baywatch?

Day 650: zu...wha?

2010-07-19T19:14:00.002+10:00

After explaining why I want to stay here and am happy, blah, blah, blah, something happened last week that was sort of a punch in the gut…and a blow to the self-esteem. I’m fine, but I’d rather have another root canal than rehash the details. Besides, this post isn’t about the cause but rather about the effect. The things one does when trying to move on from the nasty feeling that you somehow don’t measure up…job rejections, breakups, friendships gone bad. I think everyone who reads this can relate to that feeling…and has done some crazy things to move past it.

In my case, introspection is my enemy and the computer feeds my misery. Which means I am trying to stay busy…which means I’m more willing to try things that normally I would refuse to do...

Example 1: Friday night I went to a Zumba class. I am usually the one mocking this class…or any sort of fad. It never occurred to me to actually try it because: a) I’m not a joiner and b) I have the coordination of a wounded rhinoceros*. Then BDre said “let’s try it” and I, wanting anything to distract me from my thoughts, said “ok”. Actually BDre can get to me to do just about anything. God help me if the thought of skydiving ever enters her mind.

It being the first class, the room was packed…with 19y/o girls…this is supposed to help my self-esteem?? I almost turned to my friends and suggest we go for beers instead, but we stuck it out and it was actually quite fun. I’m pretty sure Zumba means “choreographed hip dislocation” in some language, and I was correct in my rhinoceros analogy, but there is something liberating about making a complete ass of yourself and just not caring. Besides I wasn’t the only one. Many couldn’t follow it well…except BDre who is Brazilian and has the dance genes to go with her nationality. If it were anyone else, I’d be fantasizing about throwing things at her head, but she is too nice…and would throw it back.

Naturally I am going back next week.

What does everyone else do when you’re having those “I suck” moments? I’m open to suggestions.

* I can’t claim authorship of this analogy but I thought it applied.

Day 647: top 10 reasons I'm staying in Australia for another 6 months

2010-07-16T16:34:00.005+10:00

For those of you who aren’t on Facebook or are on Facebook but do not stalk me (how dare you ignore me!), I recently announced my 6 month contract extension. I had been thinking of this for quite some time. It’s quite the turnaround from someone who didn’t think they’d last more than 6 months here. Don’t get me wrong, I miss the US, my friends, family, pets and I will move back…just not yet. A few reasons why (not including work reasons but those are a huge part of it):

10. I’m petrified that my next job will be in Kansas. Might as well enjoy this place while I can.

9. I finally bought my own snorkel gear but have yet to use it. Last summer, my friends went snorkeling at the neighborhood beach almost every evening after work. How cool is that? I didn’t find out about this tradition until the water was too cold for a wimp like me. This summer…

8. So many places left to see. My list is endless and I have accepted the inability of going everywhere, but Perth, Tasmania and New Zealand are at the top and are do-able. I’m hoping to knock Tasmania off the list in October and New Zealand in February.

7. So many people left to visit me. You know who you are.

6. The ocean is my backyard. There are few places (if any) in the US where I could afford to live so close to the coast. I am there almost every day, either having coffee in the morning or de-stressing after work. There's such a great vibe to the place and the people-watching is priceless.

5. My friends here rock. Not that the ones back home suck, but I know that when I leave here I probably won’t see many of them again.

4. My sense of adventure is stronger here. Moving to foreign country alone where I knew no one was probably the scariest thing I’ve ever done. But it has taught me that the comfort zone is boring. I’m more willing to try new things: eat weird food, go rock climbing, sailing, good God, I even drink coffee now. Don’t worry, I’m still a wuss and there are plenty of things I still won’t try: cliff diving (not without being pushed), surfing, vegemite, etc…

3. I finally found a decent hairstylist who doesn’t give me pseudo mullets (I am morally and visually opposed to mullets). He also gave me chocolate. Need I say more?

2. I am happy. I was pretty miserable the last year of grad school and the first year here but most everything now is just good and I am not ready to lose that feeling. Plus I like scaring people with my cheerfulness.

1. The idea of moving overseas again makes me want to put my head in my oven. And I’m slightly afraid of my oven so that’s saying a lot.

Day 643: there was no spitting and there were certainly no manly men

2010-07-12T21:40:00.003+10:00

As I mentioned in the previous post, I spent Saturday exploring some new part of the Sydney Harbour. The trail started at the Spit Bridge and follows the harbour coast back to Manly. For some reason I thought the Spit Bridge was a natural formation, a mossy green traverse…from which manly men spat. The reality was far different:
When I saw this industrial monstrosity, I had an almost uncontrollable urge to yell: “Ovaltine? A crummy commercial? Son of a bitch!”* I went on to face the rest of the trail…wiser.

Thankfully, the rest of the trek was a vast improvement over the initial landmark. The lighting sucked so I didn’t take many pictures, but the path felt isolated from the city and not many people were out so I got to have one of those “at one with nature” moments. Beautiful views, a lighthouses and even some aboriginal carvings. Not a bad way to spend a Saturday, eh?

In the distance is the Sydney Headlands, opening out to the sea.

South Head, quite possibly my favorite spot in all of Sydney.

Aboriginal fish carving. I have a theory that these are really the aboriginal equivalent of sidewalk chalk drawings.

Trip summary:
Total Distance: 15km (while I ambled along the coast on Sat, someone I know ran a 146 km race…either I am lame or he is crazy)
Number of animals stalked: 1 little penguin that lives under the wharf (he was cute and I named him Billy)
Number of pics: 10 (pathetic)
Number of times I got lost: 0 (it was almost boring)

*This movie is just a fountain of priceless quotes.

Day 642: medusa moments

2010-07-11T21:19:00.001+10:00

Work is getting to me. As are many other things. It happens, we have all these moments, and life goes on, but it is usually a sign that I need to take a break before my eyes turned red and snakes start sprouting from my head. I haven’t touched any work since Friday afternoon. That evening I hung out with friends and we philosophized on the meaning of relationships/friendships over some beers. I love nights like these.

Saturday I went exploring (I’ll save that for another post) and today I am vegging. I had intended to spend the day engaged in some seaside reading but Mother Nature made a mockery of those plans. So after running a few errands and acquiring new reading material*, I spent the afternoon at home, curled up on the couch in my glasses wearing a ridiculously uncoordinated outfit: blue-striped flannel pants, a drafty (i.e holey) red t-shirt from my alma mater and a brown fleece. I’ve been known to go to the store in my PJs, but I don’t think I could actually step outside in this ensemble.

I don’t know why I’m remotely concerned about my appearance since half of Sydney seems to be stuck in some sort of horrifying tribute to the movie Flashdance.

*I really need to stop buying books. They’re not cheap and there is a library nearby but I can’t help it. A house is not a home without tons of books lining the shelves.

Day 637: a question of sanity

2010-07-06T09:14:00.005+10:00

I don't actually participate in any sort of adventure sport: kayaking (ok once), climbing (coming soon), extreme skiing (or any skiing), paragliding (it would take a special person to convince to try this one), etc, but I am fascinated by these activities and those that do them. And the literature of these adventure seekers often find its way onto my bookshelves. Some of them are just nuts, but some are eloquent in the telling of their tales and it's hard not to be mesmerized or relate their philosophies to your own life. For example, here's a quote from Doug Ammons (famed kayaker) that I came across and thought applies to life in general:

"What people consider insane is a question of their comfort zone and whether they are willing to step out of it. To do an adventure sport, you have to enjoy stepping up to the limits of your experience and looking over the edge, hopefully carefully enough that you don't go too far before you realize it. Everybody has different appetites for newness and weighs consequences differently, so there's no magic edge that everybody agrees on. In the end, you can convince yourself that something is actually quite do-able and even fun while it sounds perfectly insane to others. It's worth remembering too, that no matter how well you think you have a new stunt figured out, things don't necessarily turn out the way you expect."

As my time in Oz possibly draws to a close, the one thing I've learned about my experiences here is that the comfort zone is boring.

Day 633: hypothetically mean

2010-07-02T19:15:00.002+10:00

This morning, I was looking for a distraction from the work induced head-banging-against-my-desk frustration. Given there was no one online to harass*, I decided to partake in the ritual of Friday morning tea with my other procrastinating co-workers.

I walked in, sat down, and was immediately asked the following question:

Other tea-partaking coworker: If you had child you didn’t know about, wouldn’t you want them to contact you?

Me: Yes…but if I had a child, I’m pretty sure I’d know about it.

Apparently I was supposed to switch genders as part of this hypothetical. Anyway, the conversation that followed was probably the most intriguing/crazy story I’ve heard (outside of a Jason Reitman film). But if you want the details, you’re going to have to actually ask me. I draw the line at broadcasting someone’s life story on my blog…unless I hate them.

I guess it’s mean to tease people with a good story and then not deliver.

*Damn you people for having a life!